Animaniacs Christmas Special
by Phil From Produce
Summary: Wakko wants to learn the true meaning of Christmas, which leads him behind the yellow podium on Wheel of Fortune. Unfortunately, Wakko isn't very good at solving puzzles...
1. It's time for Animaniacs

Chapter 1 - Wakko's Dream

Disclaimer; Animaniacs and all characters participating in this piece of fanfiction are Owned by Warner Bros, Tom Ruegger, and Steven Spielberg. All Celebrity names used in this fanfic are used without permission but then again, so were a lot of the names on the actual show.

()()()()()

The Animaniacs theme song began to play to start the show.

_It's time for Animaniacs_

_And were zany to the max_

_So just sit back and relax,_

_You'll laugh til' you collapse_

_We're Animaniacs_

_Come join the Warner bros,_

_And the Warner sister Dot!_

_Just for fun we run around the Warner movie lot!_

_they lock us in the tower, whenever we get caught,_

_But we break loose, and then vamoose, and now you know the plot!_

_We're Animaniacs,_

_Dot is cute, and Yakko Yacks!_

_Wakko packs away the snacks, While Bill Clinton plays the Sax_

_We're Animaniacs!_

_Meet Pinky & and the Brain who want to rule the Universe_

_Goodfeathers flock together, Slappy whacks em with her purse_

_Buttons chases Mindy, while Rita sings her verse_

_The writers flipped, we have no script_

_Why bother to rehearse?_

_We're Animaniacs!_

_We have pay-or-play contracts_

_we're zany to the max, there's baloney in our slacks_

_we're animaney, Totally insaney!_

_"Lucas McCainey!" Sang Dot_

_Animaniacs! Those are the facts!"_

_()()()()_

The cold December morning kept the warner siblings asleep in the tower. Yakko, Wakko, and Dot were all in a deep sleep, all dreaming of various things. Yakko was dreaming of being with Hello Nurse. Dot was dreaming about Brad Pitt, But Wakko's dream was entirely different. He was sitting in a room with a quiz that Miss Flamiel had given him.

"So Wakko, can you tell me what the true meaning of Christmas is?" Asked Miss Flamiel

"Uh, I'm not sure." Said Wakko

"That's ok, it's alright not to know." Said Miss Flamiel

"How do I learn the answer?" Asked Wakko

Miss Flamiel stood up and walked over to Wakko and put her arm on Wakko's shoulder.

"Ok, Wakko, let's say you're at a playground and there's a Teeter totter. If you put an anvil on one end, the other end will be up in the air. But you want the ends to be even. So you'd have to get another anvil to put at the one end up in the air. Even if you have to lift the anvil over your head, which is very hard." Said Miss Flamiel.

"I'm confused." said Wakko

Then randomly, Miss Flamiel walked back to her desk and started banging on some drums.

Then Wakko awoke to the sounds of banging on the door.

"Vake up Varners! It's time to get up now!" Said the Voice. Obviously it was Dr. Scratchnsniff.

"I'm coming, i'm coming." Said Wakko, dragging himself out of bed. He opened up the door to greet the P-sychiatrist.

"How are Ve today, Vakko?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"I'm still tired." Said Wakko

"Vell, zhat's ok, you got a good night's sleep!" Said Scratchnsniff. About this time, Yakko and Dot were getting up.

"Morning Scratchy." Said Yakko

"Morning Yakko, Today ve have a trip to Ze mall for some Supplies." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Ah, do we have to?" asked Yakko

Then Dot sat up from her sleep.

"Morning." Said Dot

"Ve are going to pick up some supplies and food, including stuff for Ze Christmas decorations out in ze lot." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"I don't wanna." Said Wakko

"Ve're going to get McDonalds breakfast." said Dr. Scratchnsniff

The Warners perked up.

"Lemme get my pants!" Said Yakko

"Lemme brush my teeth!" Said Wakko

"Sausage McMuffin! yay!" Said Dot

Within 5 minutes, Dr. Scratchnsniff's car was on the road, driving into town with the Warners in the backseat, eating McDonalds Breakfast.

()()()()()


	2. Hello Nurse and the Salvation army

Chapter 2 - Hello Nurse...Volunteers for the Salvation Army?

Dr. Scratchnsniff's car stopped just outside of the mall. He was getting very tired of hearing Dot's Pop music in the car stereo so he was more than fast at putting the car in park and turning the ignition off.

"Ve're here!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Alright Scratchy! Way to get us somewhere without crashing." Yakko commented

Dr. Scratchnsniff let the Warners out of the backseat of his car.

"Ok, Vakko, go and get us a Buggy." Scratchnsniff threw Wakko a quarter. "Yakko, Dot, come Vith me." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff.

While Yakko, Dot, and Dr. Scratchnsniff went off to the supermarket, Wakko walked over to the buggy corral and grabbed a buggy. While pushing it into the supermarket, he walked past a Salvation Army Kettle, and to his suprise, Hello Nurse was there ringing the bells.

"Hello Nurse!" Wakko said out loud

"Hi Wakko." Nurse said in a charming voice

"You work for the Salvation army?" asked Wakko

"I volunteer, silly! You know, I volunteer everywhere." laughed Nurse

"That's right, I should've known."

Then Wakko sung quietly to himself "_She volunteers her time at the zoo._"

"I'm collecting donations for the homeless and Hungry." Said Nurse

Wakko stood there, and being a sap for the nurse, fished a 5$ bill out of his pocket. It was his allowance that he was saving to buy gifts for his siblings, but he felt since he had everything he needed, provided by the Warner studio and Dr. Scratchnsniff, he handed over the 5$ bill and put it in the Salvation army kettle.

"Here Nurse." Said Wakko

"Thank you Wakko. You're really a sweetheart too." Said Nurse

Wakko nearly melted into a pool of charm.

"You're welcome..." Wakko's eyes were hazy with hearts and smiles.

But just as Wakko dropped the 5$ bill into the kettle, a thief pushed Wakko and Nurse aside, and stole the Kettle off of it's hook!

"Hey! Thief!" Yelled Nurse

Wakko was stunned from being pushed over. By this time, he had been away from his siblings for a while and they were curious to know if he'd been kidnapped or got lost. His siblings ran over to see what the matter was.

"Vhat happened, Vakko?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff, before noticing Nurse was there too. "Oh, nurse."

"Someone stole the kettle!" Said Wakko

"They got away with about 100$." Said Nurse

"Oh no!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

Then the nurse started crying slightly. The Warner brothers put aside their usual feelings for nurse and gave her a hug.

"It's ok, Nurse. it wasn't your fault." Said Yakko

"It just makes me mad someone would steal from the poor." Said Nurse

"No kidding!" Said Dot

Dr. Scratchnsniff interrupted the situation.

"Varners, we must get ze shopping done. Vill you be OK, Nurse?" Asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"I'll be fine." Nurse replied softly

The Warners, now in a somber mood, walked away while Nurse called her superiors to tell them about the theft.

()()()()


	3. Just Shoot Me

Chapter 3 - Just Shoot Me

The Warners sadly walked through the Supermarket, looking at random things. Most of the time they would beg and ask if they could have certain things, but after what happened to Nurse, they wern't really up to it.

"I hope that whoever stole the kettle gets caught." Said Yakko

"I hope so too." Said Dot

"I wanna tear him apart!" Wakko was angry

"Please Vakko, Getting angry is not going to bring back Ze stolen money." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"And what will?" asked Wakko

"Vell, You'll have to figure Zhat one out Yourself." said Dr. Scratchnsniff

Wakko walked along the aisles and kept thinking.

Eventually, they all passed the TV section. It just so happened that Wheel of Fortune was on.

"Hey guys, look, it's Wheel of fortune!" Said Yakko

"With Pat Sajak?" asked Dot

"And Vanna White?." Asked Wakko, to which the brothers said "Helllloooo Nurse!"

"Boys!" Dot said hopelessly.

The game was being played in the first round. While the Warners had their eyes glued to the TV, Dr. Scratchnsniff decided to go get the groceries and supplies while the Warners kept watching.

On the Screen, a contestant spun the wheel. The Category was "Classic TV."

"550." Said Pat

"Is there an S?" asked the contestant

"Yes, there are 2 S's."

The Puzzle read as follows;

[ ][ ][S][ ] [S][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ]

"Just shoot me." Said Wakko

"Wakko Warner! Don't you ever say that kind of thing again! We don't want you to die!" Said Yakko

"No, the puzzle is "Just shoot me." Said Wakko

"Really?" asked Yakko, looking at it closer.

"Can I buy an O?" asked the contestant.

"Yep, 2 O's." Said Pat. Vanna Revealed more of the puzzle.

[ ][ ][S][ ] [S][ ][O][O][ ] [ ][ ]

"Wow, Wakko, I think you're right." Said Yakko

The Contestant spun the wheel again.

"$1,000. Give me a letter." Said Pat

"Uh, A T." Said the contestant

"There are 2 T's" said Pat. Vanna lit up the letters again.

[ ][ ][S][T] [S][ ][O][O][T] [ ][ ]

"Uh, I'd like to buy an E." Said the contestant

"Sure, one E." Said Pat

Vanna lit the letter E up on the board.

[ ][ ][S][T] [S][ ][O][O][T] [ ][E]

"Pat, I'd like to solve the puzzle." Said the contestant

"Ok, what is it?" asked Pat

"Just shoot me!" Said the contestant

"Come on, I asked you to give me the answer, not a suicide wish!" Said Pat

"No! The answer is 'Just Shoot me.'" Said the contestant.

The Whole board lit up. The answer was indeed "Just Shoot Me."

[J][U][S][T] [S][H][O][O][T] [M][E]

"Wow, Wakko, you were right!" said Yakko

"For a guy who doesn't bathe, I'm impressed." Said Dot

"Thanks, it was nothin'" Said Wakko

The Tv went to a commercial break. The Warners kept watching.

()()()()()()

Authors Note: About 15 years ago (Which was about 1999) when I was 8, there was a real puzzle on an Episode of Wheel of Fortune for "Just Shoot Me" and i figured it out, and blurted the answer out loud, while my dad overheard. To this day, I'm not sure whether his reply of "I don't want to do that." was serious or sarcastic. So What you read in this chapter is based on a real experience by the Author.


	4. Wakko learns his lesson,,,

Chapter 4 - Wakko the Puzzle-man

As Dr. Scratchnsniff continued shopping, The Warners were still glued to the TV, watching Wheel of Fortune. Their amazement in Wakko's talents for solving puzzles somehow made them forget how sad they were about the kettle getting stolen.

"Ok, the next puzzle is a Phrase." Said Pat. the Puzzle board lit up like this.

[ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ] [ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ][ ]

"And Becki, it is your turn to spin." Said Pat.

Before Becki even span the wheel, Wakko blurted out the answer.

"A Mind is a Terrible thing to waste." Said Wakko

"Oh come on, Wakko, you haven't even seen any letters yet." Said Dot

"Is there a T?" asked Becki

"Yes, there's a few, let Vanna light them up." Pat said as Vanna turned the letters.

[ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ] [ ] [T][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ] [T][ ][ ][ ][ ] [T][ ] [ ][ ][ ][T][ ]

Just then, Dr. Scratchnsniff came back.

"Now come along, Varners, Ve're going through Ze Checkout." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff.

"Can i solve the puzzle?" asked Becki

"Go ahead." Said Pat

"A Mind is a Terrible thing to waste." Said Becki

"That's right!" Said Pat. the letters lit up on the board, revealing that Wakko was right yet again, not even needing letters.

"Oh dat's nice, you're so Vell behaved Vatching Vheel of Fortune!" Dr. Scratchnsniff commented.

The warners eventually began walking with Dr. Scratchnsniff. But Dot and Yakko were shocked as to how Wakko could've solved those puzzles so easily.

()()()()

Back at the studio lot, Yakko and Dot were carting groceries into one building, while Wakko and Dr. Scratchnsniff were carting more groceries into another building.

"You know, I tricked Yakko and Dot into thinking I knew those puzzles." said Wakko

"And how did you do Zhat?" Asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"I watched the episode yesterday with my friend Max. It was a rerun!" Said Wakko

"So you cheated?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"No, that's not cheating." Said Wakko

"you know, Vakko, you'd better let Yakko and Dot know Vhy you knew Zhose puzzles." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Really? What could happen if I didn't?" asked Wakko

()()()()

Meanwhile, back at the water tower, Yakko and Dot were on the wheel of fortune contestant applicant page on the internet.

"Name; Wakko Warner, Age; uh, he's about 7." Said Yakko

"Are they gonna let him on the show if he's 7?" asked Dot

"Hey, it's best to be honest." Said Yakko

"Good point." Said Dot

Yakko secretly entered his brother's name into the application page. He entered every detail about his brother that was necessary. it was then that Wakko entered the room.

"Hey guys, I have to tell you something." Said Wakko

"Just a moment." said Yakko, hitting the enter button, sending the application form.

"Now what was it you wanted to say?" asked Yakko

"Well guys, You know how we were watching Wheel of fortune and I got all those puzzles right?" asked Wakko

"Yeah?" asked Yakko and Dot

"Well...that show was a rerun. I saw the episode yesterday and I knew the answers already." Said Wakko

The color in Yakko and Dot's faces disappeared, if there was any color to begin with.

"Ha, if I was really on that show i'd be an awful contestant." Said Wakko

Yakko and Dot began to really, really freak out.

"Um...Wakko?" Yakko started

"Yes brother?" asked Wakko

"We...we...you tell him, Dot." Said Yakko

"Hey, you sent the application, I had nothing to do with it!" Said Dot

"Who's idea was it anyways? You thought he'd make a swell contestant, winning cash and prizes like a champ!" Said Yakko

"You...you mean you thought I would make a great contestant on that show so you applied for me?" asked Wakko

"Uh...yeah." Yakko began to feel guilty.

But Wakko on the other hand had another thing in mind.

"Did you say winning cash?" asked Wakko

"Yeah, why?" asked Dot

Then it hit Wakko like an anvil. He could play on the show, Win lots of money, and give it to Nurse and that would replace the stolen money from the kettle!

"You know, Wakko, There's lots of people who apply for the show. You probably won't make it." Said Yakko

Wakko's idea then shattered into a million pieces.

"Yeah. Oh well." Wakko didn't give it any more thought.

()()()()


	5. ,,,But now has to face the Consequences

Chapter 5 - Dear Wakko Warner.

The Cold morning of December 10th caused Wakko to see his own breath, even in the tower. He put on his warm clothes and went outside the tower, and was greeted by the security guard Ralph, who had climbed up with a letter in his hand.

"Uh, duh here's a letter for you Wakko." Said Ralph

"Really? For me! Is it from Santa?" asked Wakko

"I-i-i-i d-don't know." Ralph wasn't wearing a thick jacket. "Man it's so cold out here." Said Ralph

"Well, i'm gonna go read it." Said Wakko

As Ralph crawled down the tower's ladder, Wakko ran inside to read his letter. He couldn't open it right away, eventually taking a butter knife out of his gag bag to open it. of course Wakko might have been very young but he could read.

_Dear Wakko Warner_

_We would like to congratulate you on being drawn for the December 24th episode of Wheel of fortune! This is a special opportunity for us, as you will be the youngest contestant ever on the show at the age of 7. Please get a parent or guardian to call us at the following number; 1-800-93224. We can't wait to have you on the show!" _

_-Contestant Co-ordinator Mark_

Wakko's Cheer of happiness could be heard all the way from Pluto.

"What! What! What's going on!?" Asked Yakko, waking up.

"I'm on the show!" Wakko cheered

"You're kidding!" Said Dot, just waking up.

"No, it's a real letter, see!" Wakko handed the letter off to his siblings. Yakko and Dot were shocked. It was a real letter.

"What do I do now? I don't know anything about answering puzzles right!" Said a flabbergasted Wakko

"Don't worry brother, I got you into this mess, i'm gonna get you through it! Just don't forget about your poor old brother when you win a pile of cash." said Yakko

Dot didn't want to be outdone.

"But don't you want to give a few bucks to your cute, loving sister?" asked Dot, smiling cutely at Wakko

"Oh poo! You guys didn't ask me if I even wanted to be on the show! Besides, I already know what i'm going to do with the money!" Said Wakko

"Sure, what's that? Buy a shiny new corvette to impress Nurse?" asked Yakko

"How can I? I don't even know how to drive." said Wakko

"Eh, he's got a point." Said Yakko

"It says on here that I have to bring a guardian." Wakko pointed at the paper.

"Well, there's always Scratchy." Said Yakko

"Sounds good!" Wakko took off out of the tower.

"Hey! Wait up!" Said Yakko and Dot, racing to put on their warm clothes for the cold outside.

()()()()

Wakko had bolted over to Dr. Scratchnsniff's office. He knocked on the door, and was greeted by the closest thing he had to a parent.

"Good morning, Vakko." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Hey! Guess what! I got a letter from the Wheel of fortune people." said Wakko

"How did you get dis?" Then Scratchy read the letter, and after he had read it, he was just as shocked.

"But you said zhat you vere not good at solving puzzles!" Dr. Scratchnsniff reminded Wakko of the day before.

Then Yakko and Dot ran into the room.

"Hey Scratchy! Wakko's gonna be on Wheel of fortune!" said an excited Yakko.

"Oh yes, and how did he get zis letter?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Dot sent in an application in his name." Said Yakko

"Hey! You sent the application!" Said Dot

"You had the idea, you're just not big enough to use the internet." Said Yakko

"Please please! Zhere is a lesson to be learned here! Vakko, Zis is Vhy you should have Said something earlier Vhen you knew Zhose Puzzles on Ze Vheel of Fortune! Yakko, Dot! You two shouldn't have applied for Vakko! Zhat's not Fair to him!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"We know. We just thought he'd make a great contestant." Said Yakko

"But that's what I came here for. Doc, I need you to be my guardian cause it says I need to bring one...And I am going to go. I don't want to disappoint them."

"Really? You vant to go? Even zhough you might not be very good?" Asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"I could learn, right?" asked Wakko

"We'll help you, Wakko! In exchange for part of your winnings." Said Yakko

"No, no, Za money he Vins, He does Vhat he Vants Vit it! And besides, is zit really fair zhat you entered him Vithout his permission?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Ya, Scratchy's got a point." Said Yakko

"We'll help anyway we can. We want him to be happy." Said Dot

"Thanks guys. Can we get started soon?" asked Wakko

"I'll go and set up an old set in one of Ze studios!" Dr. Scratchnsniff walked off to help Wakko get prepared for his TV appearance.


	6. Ze mock game for Vakko Varner

Chapter 6 - A bad choice of letters

In one of the unused studios, Dr. Scratchnsniff had set up a mock wheel of fortune set, building a wheel, a puzzle board, and podiums. How he did this in an hour is still hard to comprehend, but it's animaniacs so science gets thrown out the window. When he was done building the set, The Warners came in and saw the set-up.

"Oooh." Ooohed Wakko

"Real nice set-up Scratchy! Did you build this?" asked Yakko

"I like a man who can build things." Dot said in a charmed voice

"Uh, Ja. Let us get started." said Dr. Scratchnsniff, Walking off the set to hide behind the curtain while the warners took the podiums.

A studio worker played a CD player with the Wheel of fortune theme on it.

"Ja! Welcome to Vheel of Fortune! Just look at zhis fabulous Dinnervare set! And zhis classic 1988 Ford Aerostar!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"That's your car, Scratchy." Said Yakko

"Ja, I know! But I need to create zhis idea zhat Vakko is on the Show Vinning Fabulous prizes." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Oh, ok." Then Yakko whispered to his brother "I think he's trying to get rid of it."

"And Zhere is $25,000 in cash! $100,000 just vaiting to be von on Vheel of Fortune!"

The Warners stood at their podiums.

"Clap, clap!" Dr. Scratchnsniff told the Warners. They began clapping.

"Zat's good, good, Vakko will need to clap on set." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

A small crowd of workers were there to simulate an audience.

"And now, here is your host, Pat Zajak!" And Dr. Scratchnsniff walked out from the curtain he went behind.

"Ya, Scratchy! Way to get a better job!" Said Yakko

"Yakko, i'm only pretending to be Pat Zajak." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Oh geez, Scratchy, You should be careful, people might be confused." Said Yakko

"Oh dear." Dr. Scratchnsniff tried to ignore Yakko "Now I cannot do zhis job alone, so let me introduce Vanna Vhite!"

And then, stepping out in a fancy dress, Hello Nurse as Vanna. Yakko and Wakko both fell over drooling everywhere.

"Helllooo Nurse!" Said Yakko & Wakko in Unison

"I love wheel of fortune..." Yakko melted into a pool of goo.

"Boys. Go fig." Dot commented

"Now Ve will start ze game of Vheel of fortune. Ve did a coin toss backstage, and Vakko, you get to go first." said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Ok." Said Wakko

"And Ze category for zhis round is 'Thing.' Vhenever you're ready, Spin Ze vheel."

The puzzle read like this

[ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ]

Wakko grabbed the mock wheel, and spun it. It landed on 300.

"Ok, Vakko, guess a letter." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Uh, is there a Z?" asked Wakko

"Now Vakko, before we continue, Ze letter Z is not a good choice, it's uncommon!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"But is there a Z?" asked Wakko

"No, Vakko, Zhere's no Z!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"But what letter should I pick?" asked Wakko

"Vell, Ze common letters of Ze alphabet are R,S,T,L,N, and E." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Ok, i'll take those letters then." said Wakko

"No, Vakko, you cannot take all zhose letters, you can only pick Vun at a time." said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Well, I didn't know that." Said Wakko

Poor Dr. Scratchnsniff knew he had a somewhat long road ahead of him.

"I'll explain Ze rules as ve go along. Now Pick a letter."

"Uh...Q?" asked Wakko

"No, Vakko!" Dr. Scratchnsniff was getting a bit frustrated "Zhat isn't a common letter either!"

"Help me out here guys!" Wakko turned to his siblings.

"X?" asked Dot

"Y?" Asked Yakko

"4?" Asked Dot

"Alex TrebeKeri Russell?" Asked Yakko

"No! No! No! Zhese are not common letters! And Vhat do you mean Alex TrebeKeri Russell! Zhat is not a letter, Zhat is a combination of the names Alex Trebek and Keri Russell!" Complained an angry Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Well once again Captain obvious here saves the day again!" Yakko kept pushing Dr. Scratchnsniff's Buttons.

"Oh Geez! Dot! You take a turn, give Vakko a Chance to learn how to play!" said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Ok, I'll spin the wheel." said Dot

Dot spun the wheel. It landed on 500$.

"Ok, Dot, Guess a letter." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Um, is there a C for Cute?" Asked Dot

"No!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Ok, how about G?" asked Dot

"Yes! Yes there is a G!" said Dr. Scratchnsniff

Nurse strutted across the puzzle board and lit up the puzzle letter.

[ ][ ][ ][G][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ]

"Oh boy! What did I win?" asked Dot

"You don't Vin anything Dot, Zhis is a mock show for Vakko to learn how to play ze game." said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Hey! You mean to tell me we don't win any prizes on this show either?" Yakko butted in with a full head of steam "Who keeps making gameshows where you don't win anything?"

"Stop being so Difficult Yakko! Dot, Spin Ze Vheel again!" an angry Dr. Scratchnsniff said out loud.

The wheel landed on 900$.

"Ok, is there a T?" asked Dot

"No T, but a good guess, ja?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"I thought it was." Said Dot

"Ok, Vakko, it's now your turn! Spin Ze Vheel."

Wakko reached over and spun the wheel. It landed on 600$.

"Ok, Vakko, guess a letter." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Um, is there an S?" asked Wakko

"Oooh! Yes! Yes! Zhere are 4 S's! Good guess!" Dr. Scratchnsniff said

Nurse lit up the board, reaching over to get some of the letters, much to Yakko's delight because he got a great view down her dress.

"I love it when she does that." Yakko said to the camera

The board looked as follows;

[S][ ][ ][G][ ][ ][S][S][ ][S]

"Ok, Vakko, Zou can Buy a Vowel or Zolve Ze puzzle." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Uh, Can I buy an A?" asked Wakko

"Yes you may! Zhere is one." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

The puzzle looked like this;

[S][ ][ ][G][ ][A][S][S][ ][S]

"Oh no!" Yakko ran over to the puzzle board and covered up the A and the 2 S's and stood there.

"There, I just saved us from going off the air." Said Yakko

"Yakko! Get back here at Vunce!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"But we gotta keep this word covered! It's a kid's show!" Said Yakko

"Ok, ok, Vakko, guess another letter!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"But Yakko's covering it up!" Complained Wakko

Dr. Scratchnsniff was getting very frustrated.

"I knew I should've picked another puzzle." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Can I buy an E?" asked Wakko

"Sure, Zhere is an E." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

Nurse stepped around a nervous Yakko, who got a close up view of the nurse walking by. Of course, He had to hold his position if he wanted to stay on the air. The Nurse revealed the next letter in the puzzle.

[S][ ][ ][G][ ][A][S][S][E][S]

And that forced Yakko to extend his arms a little more to cover the last 2 letters.

"Wakko! I don't think I can hold this position any longer!" said Yakko

"Hang on brother! I think i've got it!" Said Wakko "Scratchy, I Want to solve the puzzle." Said Wakko

"Vakko, I am not Dr. Scratchnsniff, I am Pat Zajak." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Oh poo, first you're Dr. Scratchnsniff, Then you're a P-sychiatrist, Now you're Pat Sajak, Can't you make up your mind?" Asked Wakko

"JUST SAY ZE ANSWER!" Dr. Scratchnsniff was ready to explode with frustration.

"Ok...it is..." Wakko got cut off by Yakko

"...in the next chapter, so finish reading this sentence and go and find out what Wakko says!"

()()()()()()


	7. Dr Scratchnsniff finally snaps

Chapter 7 - Dr. Scratchnsniff finally snaps

"Sodgrasses?" asked Wakko

Dr. Scratchnsniff was ready to explode.

"NO! NO! NO! Dot! Please just say ze answer and we'll move on." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"But i don't know it either." Said Dot

And that was all Dot had to say to set Dr. Scratchnsniff off like a rocket.

"ZE ANSWER IS SUNGLASSES! HOW HARD VAS THAT!" Dr. Scratchnsniff lost his temper

The Warners all began cheering and saying "That's right! you've won!"

"I DIDN'T WIN YOU MONKEYS!" Dr. Scratchnsniff had completely lost his mind.

"See what I mean? Dot doesn't win anything, then you didn't win. Total Rip-off of a gameshow if you ask me." Said Yakko

Dr. Scratchnsniff then grabbed a flask of whiskey from his pocket and swigged enough to calm himself in the hopes he might be able to make it through the mock show.

"Let's move onto ze next round, ok?" Dr. Scratchnsniff tried to regain control.

"I swear i'm gonna win this round." Said Wakko

"Good Vakko, Positive energy is Good for Ze mind." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Not if i win first." said Yakko

"Ze next puzzle is a phrase, ok? Zhere's lots of Vords up there but zat means more money, ok Vakko? Now Dot, Spin ze Vheel."

While Dot spun the wheel, Wakko and Yakko got a look at the puzzle.

[ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ][ ]?

"400." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Can i get a Cute little C?" asked Dot

"Yes you can, dot! Zhere is a C!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

Nurse lit up the C in the puzzle. now the puzzle read like this.

[ ][ ][ ][ ] [C][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ][ ]?

"I'll Spin again." Said Dot

Dot spun the wheel, and it landed on 800.

"Can i get a T?" asked Dot

"yes you may! Zhere is a T." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff, giving dot 1,200 points or funny money, whatever works.

[ ][ ][ ][T] [C][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ][ ]?

"I wanna buy a vowel." Said Dot

"Sure, Vhat vowel vould you like?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"An E, please." said Dot

"Zhere are No E's, I'm so sorry dot!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Oh, Shoot!" Dot said in disgust

"My turn, eh scratch...er, pat?" asked Yakko

"Yes it is. Spin Ze wheel or solve Ze puzzle." said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Well, that puzzle's a little tough, so i'm gonna spin." Said Yakko

Yakko spun the wheel. To his amazement, it landed on $2,500!

"Oh wow.." Yakko was shocked

"Yes! now guess a letter." said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Is there an S?" asked Yakko

"Oh, yes! yes! yes! Zhere are some S's!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

As Nurse lit up the letters, Yakko turned to the camera and said "I'll have what he's having."

The puzzle was now as follows.

[ ][ ][ ][T] [C][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ][S][S][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ][ ]?

"Ok, Yakko, You have 5,000, Vhat Vould you like to do?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Um...Can i buy the A and just hope it's not behind the S's?" asked Yakko

"I made sure Zhey were not going to be behind Ze S's this time." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Oh, good." Said Yakko "The Censors are scared of us already."

The Puzzle lit up some letters. It now read like this.

[ ][ ][A][T] [C][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ][S][S][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ][ ]?

"How about buying the O at a discount?" asked Yakko

"No! Ve don't sell Vowels at discounts!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Hey bud, i'm a loyal customer! I've been buying your vowels for years!" Said Yakko

"But I can give you 4 O's for 250, How does Zat sound?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Eh, You drive a hard bargain, Scratchy. Done." said Yakko

"Ok, Yakko, you still have 4,500! Vhat are you gonna do?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

[ ][ ][A][T] [C][O][ ][ ][ ] [ ][O][S][S][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][O] [ ][ ][O][ ][ ]?

"Ok, I'll buy the I, please." Said Yakko

"We only have one I." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"That explains the high prices on vowels these days. Supply and demand." Said Yakko

"Yakko! Za prices on Vowels is 250 Each! Zere's no Discounts or price changes!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Not even 50% off?" asked Yakko

"You'd sell more vowels that way." Dot added

"Ahh! No! No! No! You are being very difficult today, Yakko!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"I guess I won't be having what he's having." Yakko said to the camera

The puzzle read like this.

[ ][ ][A][T] [C][O][ ][ ][ ] [ ][O][S][S][I][ ][ ][ ] [ ][O] [ ][ ][O][ ][ ]?

"Ok, Yakko, You have 4,250, what are you going to do?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"I guess i'll pay for the last vowel." Said Yakko

"Ok, Ze last vowel is Za U, and it's in za puzzle." said Dr. Scratchnsniff

[ ][ ][A][T] [C][O][U][ ][ ] [ ][O][S][S][I][ ][ ][ ] [ ][O] [ ][ ][O][ ][ ]?

"I guess i'm spinning again." Said Yakko

Yakko spun the wheel. as good as his luck was before, it deflated when the wheel landed on Bankrupt!

"Oh, Bankrupt! I am zo zorry Yakko!" Dr. Scratchnsniff tried to be a mature adult but you could tell in his voice he was happy Yakko hit the bankrupt spot.

"Noooo! I don't wanna be bankrupt!" Yakko acted hysterically

"Vakko, it's now your turn." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Ok, I'll spin the wheel, pat!" Said Wakko

Wakko spun the wheel, and it landed on 1,000.

"ok, Vhat letter would you like?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"I'd like the first letter of my name...W!" Said Wakko

"Yes! Zhere is 2 W's!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

The puzzle read as follows.

[W][ ][A][T] [C][O][U][ ][ ] [ ][O][S][S][I][ ][ ][ ] [ ][O] [W][ ][O][ ][ ]?

Wakko took a long stare at the puzzle.

"Pat, I'd like to solve the puzzle!"

"Ok, Vhat is it, Vakko?" Asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

Just before Wakko was ready to say his answer, Yakko stopped his fake crying to encourage him.

"You'll get it right this time, Brother!" Said Yakko, Just as the chapter ended so that way everyone reading would be irritated.


	8. Aaaaaah We gotta take a commercial break

Chapter 8 - Commercial Break

"Don't worry, Wakko, I'm cheering for you." Said Yakko

"Thanks Brother, But what could possibly go wrong?" Asked Wakko

"That's right! Zhats the right answer!" Dr. Scratchnsniff cheered. The Puzzleboard lit up to reveal that the puzzle was indeed "What could possibly go wrong?" And when it did, Yakko and Dot cheered for their victorious little brother.

"Dot and I just couldn't be more proud of ya!" Said Yakko

"Oh poo! I thought the puzzle was 'What could mossimo do worse?' The pants they made me kept falling off!" Said Wakko.

But during the celebration, another character wandered onto the set.

"That's my catchphrase! What could possibly go wrong?" said Bubsy the Bobcat.

"Oh God, not Bubsy the Bobcat!" Yakko exclaimed "Geez, the only good thing about that show was that the cheques cleared."

As Bubsy left the stage, Dr. Scratchnsniff came over.

"So, Vakko! Do you understand how Ze game works now?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"I sure do! Thanks for setting this up, Doc!" Said Wakko

"Oh yes, now I vant you to go and study and play ze Computer game and get more practice, Zou want to vin, ja?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"You bet!" Said Wakko

"ok, I'll Zee zou all later. Thank you Nurse for being Vanna Vhite!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Thank you nurse!" Said the Warners. Yakko turned to the camera

"Hey, we'd love to continue this story, but ah-aaaaaaah we gotta take a commercial break. The network needs it's money too." Yakko smiled

()()()()

The first commercial was set in a room with Wakko Warner in a nice suit jacket.

"Hello, I'm Wakko Warner, President of the Wakko Warner Wear your Underwear Campaign." Wakko grinned at the camera "We're a non-profit organization that encourages your kids to wear their underwear properly. Remember, they call it underwear for a reason...you wear it under your pants!" the camera zoomed out to reveal that Wakko was wearing underwear, and then he pulled up a pair of pants.

"What exactly do we do? Here's a simulation of what we're all about." Wakko then walked off of one set, and onto a schoolground where Katie Ka-boom was chatting with her friends, But her underwear is sticking out of her pants and her tanktop is so low her bra straps are sticking out.

"Excuse me, miss, But i'm Wakko Warner of the Wakko Warner Wear your Underwear campaign, might I have a moment of your time?" asked Wakko

"Why?" Asked Katie

"You see, your underwear is sticking out and i'm here to fix it!" Wakko then grabbed Katie's tanktop and moved it so it covered her bra strap.

"Hey what are you doing!?" Katie began freaking out

"I'm making you look good." Said Wakko, then pulling katie's pants up, covering her panties.

"It's supposed to look that way, you dope!" Yelled Katie

"Oh really, do they call it overwear?" asked Wakko

"Leave my underwear alone!" Katie moved her pants back where they were before.

"Your mom will be mad." Said Wakko, pulling up Katie's pants again.

Katie began losing her temper and steam began pouring out of her body.

"You see." Wakko turned to the camera "We fix your daughters underwear so she won't end up like britney spears." Wakko walked off set, and Katie-kaboom exploded right there on the yard.

"So please donate your money to the Wakko Warner Wear your underwear campaign. anyone who donates $100 gets a pair of tighty-whiteys autographed by Don Knotts!" Wakko winked at the camera

The scene cut to screen with text on it.

"Wakko Warner Wear your underwear campaign! Hey! What's that under there?"

()()()()()()

"And now, a message from the Tammel toy company." Said the narrator

Then the camera pointed at dot, holding a fashion doll.

"Hello, I'm Princess Angelina Contessa Louisa Francesca Banana Fanna Bo Besca the 3rd, But you can call me Dot!" Dot flashed a cute smile "And what I have here are 2 dolls, one is the Tammel real-life Tricia doll." Dot held up a homely looking brunette doll "And the other is the leading competitor's doll." Dot held up a barbie doll.

"Now why would you want to pay 50$ for this piece of plastic that looks like a perfectly sculpted woman who can only stand up with the help of a plastic stand? Why would you give this perfect-looking blonde model to your young daughter so she can have self-esteem issues when she turns 16?"

Dot then got closer to the camera.

"You saw the last commercial, it's girls like that who play with the competitor's dolls."

Then Dot returned to the previous position.

"So why waste all that money, and then have to spend even more just buying all the junk that goes with it, when you can spend 10$ on this normal looking Real-life Tricia doll? Your daughter will be totally able to relate, because the doll thinks she's fat but really isn't, has a dead end job as a cashier and no boyfriend! She comes with pair of plain jeans, basic white shirt, 2 broken underwire bras and a boring old bathing suit, and her dad's beat up 1990 mazda 323 hatchback for going out with friends. But she's soooooo cute!"

Dot brought out another cute smile.

"But wait! Order one within the next 10 minutes, And i'll throw in this 'Hello Nurse' doll, absolutely free!"

Dot held up a Hello Nurse doll.

"Comes complete with nurse outfit, french maid outfit, and leopard skin bikini."

Just then Yakko and Wakko jumped into the shot.

"Shut up and take my money!" Yakko smiled, holding up a wad of cash.

Dot on the other hand was less than enthusiastic.

"Since when do you 2 play with dolls?" Asked Dot

"Since we discovered that the salvation army sells fashion dolls...with no clothes." said Wakko, who began drooling a bit.

Yakko turned the camera "So what's the point of censoring nudity from your children, when you can almost see straight to Florida at the local thrift shop?" Asked Yakko

"Deeee-sguisting!" Dot stuck her tongue out, before turning back to the camera to say her last line.

"So why are you waiting? Order now before my brother starts using other suggestive terms that hopefully your kids won't understand!"

Then the announcer spoke on the last blue screen which had all the mail order information on it.

"To order, have your credit card ready and call 1-800-5318008, and don't forget, order in the next 10 minutes, and we'll also send you this fabulous Hello nurse doll, absolutely free! Don't wait! Don't look at the number to call upside down! Look at it right-side up and call now!"

()()()()()

The Next Ad was for Yakko's World of Whales!

"My name is Yakko Warner...And today..."

Then Yakko burst out into hysterical crying.

"The whales are dying! We need money! We need donations! We need Doughnuts! We need.." Yakko went back to speaking normally "A pretty secretary to replace the one Shamu almost ate last week. And when we say almost, we mean bathing suit and all...Lucky for us the censors were asleep at the time." Yakko winked at the camera with a grin.

Yakko then turned to the side and went up to a whiteboard.

"To further educate you on our research on Whales here at the Yakko Warner's World of Whales Campaign, we decided to write a song, and it goes something, like this..."

Then Yakko began to sing to the tune of "Oh Canada!"

_Oh Killer Whale_

_how do you swim so free_

_You have not one tooth_

_instead something called baleen_

_it filters the stuff_

_inside of your mouth_

_and then you swallow your food whole_

_You're big and wide_

_oh killer whale_

_You burped jonah out your blowhole_

_God keep you strong_

_glorious and free_

_Oh killer whale_

_we always watch out for thee_

_oh killer whale_

_never forget free...willlll...yyyyyyy!_

Yakko stopped his singing.

"So in the hopes that you have lots of money, not easily offended by me taking the national anthem of Canada and butchering it for the sake of a overgrown dolphin, We hope you will donate to the Yakko Warner's World of Whales foundation! Donate more than $1,000 within the next 10 minutes, and i'll throw in this copy of the 2000 documentary, Dolphins!"

Yakko then turned to the camera

"I hear the lady scientist in the movie doesn't wear a wetsuit." Yakko grinned again, before returning to the main camera.

"So what'r'ya waitin' for? Pledge today! Pledge your kid's money! Pledge your daughter's college fund! Remortgage your house! Do whatever it takes to donate to the Yakko Warner's World of Whales foundation!"

But at this commercial, Slappy the Squirrel was watching from her TV.

"Get back to the show already!" She yelled

"That's Slappy!" The warners sang the last line in slappy's theme song as the Slappy Squirrel screen was replaced with a "Now, Back to the Animaniacs Christmas Special" Screen.

()()()()


	9. The day before the Big day

Chapter 9 - On the way to the sony picture studios

The days passed and as they did, Wakko played the Wheel of fortune game on the computer and eventually got better at it. He eventually was able to guess words based on letters in the puzzle and learned how to strategize so he could earn more winnings.

Then the night came before the trip to Hollywood, California. While Dot and Yakko were sound Asleep, Wakko fell into a nightmare. His nightmare consisted of him being late for the show, and watching the nurse getting mugged again by another robber, and him not being able to stop it from happening. He had other horrible visions in his sleep, but as the night went on, they eventually left him alone to drift into a deep sleep.

The next morning, Wakko awoke and realized everything was still normal. He was not late for the show and Nurse had not been mugged again. He had awoken rather early, considering that 9 Am is early to some.

He went over to the kitchen in the tower, grabbed a couple of bananas for breakfast and sat down at the computer for more Wheel of fortune.

A few hours passed and then Yakko and Dot awoke. by then, Dr. Scratchnsniff had gotten up the tower and wanted to get the Warners ready for the long trip to Sony picture studios. After a few minutes, the Warners were ready to go.

While on the way to the Sony picture studios, Yakko and Dot were busy fighting as they normally did in the backseat, but Wakko got to sit in the front seat with Dr. Scratchnsniff.

"Are You nervous Vakko?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"A little. I had a bad dream last night." said Wakko

"Aw, i'm Sorry Vakko. Bad dreams are no fun. Vhat happened?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Well, I was late for the show." Said Wakko

"Go on." said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"And then I saw Nurse getting robbed by that bad guy again."

"oh dear...Zhen Vhat happened?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"But I couldn't stop him. My legs didn't work."

"Zhat is very sad. But you understand zhat it vas only a dream." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"I know. Are we there yet?" asked Wakko

"No Vakko, We are not there yet." said Dr. Scratchnsniff

After about 30 minutes of waiting and traffic, Dr. Scratchnsniff got the warners to the studios.

"Ve're here." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Yay!" the Warners cheered as they got out of the car and they saw the Wheel of fortune logo.

"Wow! It's just like the intro video! Even the spotlights are real!" Said Yakko

(A.N.; To get an idea, watch the Wheel of Fortune Intro from the late 90's.)

While the Warners stared in awe at the studio entrance, The contestant co-ordinator came out.

"Who are you guys?" he asked

"I'm Yakko!" Said Yakko

"I"m Wakko!" Said Wakko

"And i'm Princess Angelina Contessa Louisa Francesca Banana Fallana...Oh shoot!" Dot yelled out while Wakko and Yakko groaned.

"Are gonna go through this again?" asked Yakko

"Hey! It's a tough line!" said Dot

"She's Dot." Dr. Scratchnsniff interrupted "And I'm Vakko's Guardian, Dr. Otto Scratchnsniff."

"Welcome to the Sony picture studios! My name is Mark, i'm the contestant co-ordinator. Wakko, We're excited to have you here, you're our youngest contestant." Said Mark

"Ja, Is Zhere a rule saying Zhat no vun under 18 gets to play?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"You know, it was really weird, but our boss wanted Wakko to play. It's christmas so we wanted to do something special...and from what his application said, he was a very talented player." said Mark

"Yeah, that's our brother!" Said Dot

"He's skilled all right." Said Yakko, trying to avoid spilling the fact he and Dot applied for Wakko.

"Well, first i'd like to take you on a tour of the studios, as well as meet the other contestants and the crew." Said Mark

"Do we get to meet Pat Sajak?" asked Dot

"and Vanna White?" asked Yakko

"You get to meet everyone, now let's go on the tour." Said Mark

()()()()()


	10. The Worst opponent you could face

Chapter 10 - The Worst opponent you could face...

Mark took the Warners and Dr. Scratchnsniff through the halls.

"Here we have a copy of the first tape we ever made of Wheel of Fortune, from 1974." Said Mark

"Back when Scratchy had hair." Said Yakko

"Yakko! Zis is not ze time to be Vacky!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

Mark continued bringing the Warners through the halls.

"And here, this is Vanna White's first dress." Said Mark, pointing at the pink dress Vanna first wore on December 13th, 1982.

"It's sooo pretty." Said Dot

"Isn't that a stereotypical thing for a girl to say?" asked Yakko to the camera

Mark brought the Warners through the studio and showed them a bunch of cool things, including old sets that had been used throughout the years, including the old curtains from the 70s and old prize wedges that were no longer in use. At the end of the tour, the Warners were brought to the cafeteria.

"Time for lunch." Said Mark

"Oh boy!" Wakko smiled

"Contestants get a free buffet lunch. Eat until you're full." said Mark "And yeah, the other contestants are coming in a few minutes."

The Warners and Dr. Scratchnsniff sat at the table.

"I wonder what they have." Said Wakko

Then a bunch of pretty girls came out holding menus.

"Helllooo Nurse!" Said Yakko & Wakko at the same time

"Boys." Said Dot in a hopeless voice

"Oh Sheesh, you can dress zhem up, but you can't take them anyvhere!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Hello boys, what can we get you?" asked one of the girls

Yakko took his time and tried to make a choice, while Wakko already knew what he wanted.

"I'll have this, and this, and this, and this, and this, and this, and this, and about 12 of those." Said Wakko, pointing at everything on the menu

"Oh dear." Dr. Scratchnsniff was getting nervous

"Can I get the double patty cheeseburger with this beer?" asked Yakko

"Yakko, you cannot drink beer!" Said Dr. Scratchsniff

"No, no, no, this beer." said Yakko, Pointing at a root beer on his menu

"Oh sheesh, Vhy didn't you just say it Vas root beer, Yakko?" Asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Cause seeing you act that way is funny." smirked Yakko

After that, Dot ordered her lunch and Dr. Scratchnsniff ordered his. The group all sat there, waiting. Wakko started singing his Wakko's America song at random.

"_Baton Rouge, Louisiana, Indianapolis, Indiana, and Columbus is the capital of Ohio..."_

"Wakko, you're gonna be on Wheel of Fortune, not Gyp-parody." Said Yakko

"But i'm bored." Said Wakko

Just then, the other contestants and Mark came back.

"Oh...no." Said the Warners upon seeing one of Wakko's opponents.

"Oh hoo hoo hoo! There's nothing like lunch to make me feel all yum yum doodle dumb inside!" Said a very noisy Baloney the Dinosaur.

The Warners tried to shake themselves to think this was just a nightmare, it wasn't. This was as real as it got.

"Look down, he might not recognize us." said Yakko

Then Baloney came right over to the Warners.

"We're doomed." Said Wakko

"Hey! It's my goody good friends Yakko, Wakko, and Dot! I'm so, so, so glad to see you guys!" Said Baloney

"Uh...yeah. It's great to see you too." Said Yakko

Of course, Dr. Scratchnsniff knew who Baloney was.

"Oh, You're Baloney Za dinosaur, Are you going to be on Vheel of Fortune too?" he asked

"Yep! I know I can win-win-win! Yay!" Baloney danced around like an idiot.

Of course, Dr. Scratchnsniff wanted to know how the Warners knew Baloney.

"How does zhis big dummy know you?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"It's a long story." Said Dot

"You see, we were trying to run away from you, Ralph and Nurse when we found these kids." said Yakko

"And we lied and said bad people were after us, so they brought us to Baloney's schoolhouse to keep us safe." Said Dot

"And we realize now we probably should've just turned ourselves in." Said Yakko

Baloney calmed down and sat down at a distant table. Then the last contestant came.

"I don't wanna look." Said Wakko "Who is it?"

Yakko took a peek. He then started acting hyper at the sight of a beautiful woman.

"Hellllloooo Nurse." Said Yakko

"Say what!?" Wakko looked over and it turned out to be a Blue-eyed blonde cougar.

Dot looked at the woman and sighed.

"Someone's gotta tell me what makes women like her so special." Said Dot

Wakko and Yakko bolted over to meet the contestant.

"Hey...hehe, can I take your coat?" asked Yakko, pretending to be a gentleman

"Oooh, what a gentleman." The cougar smiled at Yakko. Yakko turned to the camera.

"Thank the good lord for puberty." Yakko raised his eyebrows twice

Then Dot dragged her brothers back to their table.

"That'll be enough o'that!" She said. of course, Yakko and Wakko didn't take their eyes off of the cougar as they were dragged away.

When the waitresses brought the Warners their orders, They began chowing down, And Wakko prepared mentally for the challenge ahead of him.

()()()()()


	11. The Stage is Set

Chapter 11 - Get a good night's sleep

After Wakko had a huge lunch, Mark the contestant Co-ordinator wanted to get everyone's attention.

"If I can have your attention." He began "We'd like to bring the contestants and their friends and family to the Greenroom. There you'll meet Pat Sajak and Vanna White."

Wakko was nervous. But Yakko was excited.

"V-V-Vanna White?" Yakko nearly began drooling

"Follow me." Said Mark.

The Warners and Dr. Scratchnsniff, Baloney, and the blonde cougar all followed the Contestant Co-ordinator down more hallways.

"You'll meet them in 5 minutes." Said Mark

"Oh boy. Yakko, Vakko, Please don't try to say 'hello nurse' to Vanna, please! For my sake?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"I'll Try." Lied Yakko, then showing his crossed fingers to the camera

"Ok, Ve don't Vant to be kicked out." said Dr. Scratchnsniff

The group was brought into the greenroom, where there were several couches and comfortable chairs for sitting and relaxing. Wakko and his siblings sat together, Baloney took up a whole couch, and the cougar sat beside Yakko and Wakko. Of course Yakko continued to try and charm her.

"So, See any good movies lately?" asked Yakko

"I saw Jane Eyre for the first time yesterday." She said

Then Wakko butted in "You really should check out Wakko's Wish. I'm a big movie star by the way."

"Oh, how cute." Said the cougar

"So gorgeous, what can I call ya?" Yakko got between his brother and the lady

"My name is Barbara. My girlfriends call me Barbie." Said Barbara

"Thats a pretty name." Yakko melted into his chair.

"Isn't that a generic thing for boys to say?" Asked Dot who was listening in

But then 5 minutes passed, and then the moment of truth happened. Mark walked into the room, ready to introduce the famous people.

"Ladies and Gentleman, Pat Sajak, and Vanna White!" Said Mark.

And in walked the host and hostess of Wheel of Fortune. Of course, Yakko and Wakko got wide-eyed upon seeing Vanna White in person.

"Hel...hell...llooo..." Yakko couldn't even finish the sentence before Dr. Scratchnsniff grabbed him by the arm.

"Yakko, you promised you wouldn't do that!"

"I had my fingers crossed." Yakko showed his crossed fingers.

"It's Ok!" Vanna came over and smiled at Yakko, Wakko, and Dot, who in turn, smiled back at her.

"Oh my! You're all sooooo cute!" Vanna smiled at the Warners

Yakko's heart nearly came out of his chest from being so excited.

Vanna turned to Wakko.

"You're going to be the youngest contestant on our show ever! Isn't that exciting?" she asked

"Yeah..." Wakko's heart nearly came out of his chest too

Dot crossed her arms and said "Boys."

"Go fig." Vanna winked at Dot

Then Pat came over to meet the Warners while Vanna went to meet Baloney

"So you're the young contestant who's gonna be on our show?" asked Pat

"You bet." said Wakko, Doing the peace symbol with his hand.

"You know, i'm just gonna stick over here for now. That big orange polyester dinosaur's creeping me out." Said Pat

The Warners noticed Baloney was hugging Vanna, who felt very uncomfortable over there.

"Yeah, we know him from way back." Said Yakko

"Can I have everyone's attention please?" asked Mark, who interrupted the meeting

Everyone got quiet and listened.

"We're going to do group pictures, and after that we're going to send you guys off to a nice hotel before taping tommorow. You'll be back here at 6 Pm and then you'll do a live taping at 7."

"A live taping?" Asked Barbie

"Well, with a delay. Just in case things go wrong. But i'm pretty sure we'll be ok." Mark assured the group.

The group then left the greenroom to go to the picture room. The first picture was Wakko with Pat and Vanna. Of course, being that Wakko was so short, Pat and Vanna had to crouch with him. The next picture was with family. In this picture, Wakko and Dot stood on Dr. Scratchnsniff's shoulders while Yakko made himself comfortable right next to Vanna. He raised one eyebrow and showed a slick grin as the flash went off.

"Ok, Baloney, you're next." Said Mark

Baloney then walked over and Pat and Vanna forced a smile right next to him. When his picture was took, Pat and Vanna signaled for Mark to hurry because they didn't want to stand near Baloney longer than was needed. The next picture was with Barbie. During that picture, Pat didn't have to make an effort to smile.

"Ok, Now we want to get a big group picture. Everyone get in." ordered Mark.

While Wakko was on Dr. Scratchnsniff's shoulders, Yakko placed himself between Vanna and Barbie, resting his arms on their shoulders like he was Hugh Hefner. Baloney stood in back due to his large size, and Dot stood on Pat's shoulders.

"Ok, Big smile!"

The flash went off. That was the last picture of the day.

"Ok guys, Thank you for coming on time today, the hotel is just across the way, it's one of the nicest in hollywood, and it's complimentary on us, so please be respectful."

The contestants let out a yay for the nice hospitality ahead of them.

"We shall see you all tommorow at 6. Until then, get a good night's sleep." Said Mark

()()()()()()

Dr. Scratchnsniff brought the Warners out to his old car.

"Ve'll check in Immediately. So don't go running off." ordered Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Don't worry Scratchy, this is the first time we've ever done a fancy hotel." Said Yakko

"Do they have a spa?" asked Dot

The Warners kept questioning the temporary paradise they would stay in that night. Of course, Dr. Scratchnsniff had to get them there first.

()()()()


	12. Yakko's Misfortune

Chapter 12 - Yakko's Misfortune

After Dr. Scratchnsniff had checked the Warner siblings and himself into the nice hotel, they all went upstairs to the nice suite that the Wheel of fortune people had rented for them for 2 nights. The suite was large and all 3 siblings got their own rooms for the 2 nights. While Dr. Scratchnsniff ordered a Pizza dinner, the Warners didn't know what to do. Well, Except for Wakko, he had set up the Wheel of fortune game on the suite's computer and was tuning himself up for the game next day. But on the other hand, Yakko and Dot wanted to check out the pool that was advertised on the front.

"Ok, but ze pizza Vill be here in an hour. Don't stay too long." he ordered

Both Yakko and Dot cheered as they booked it for the pool.

(A.N.; If you've seen the "I'm mad" Animaniacs bit, it kind of sounded like the cheer when the Warners arrived at the funfair)

But while his sibs were interested in having fun, Wakko stayed on the computer, playing the game. As he played, Dr. Scratchnsniff watched and smiled. Wakko was doing so well, now he just had to beat his 2 opponents, while one was somewhat smarter, the other would just annoy the group.

()()()()

Down at the pool, Dot was waiting for Yakko to come out of the boy's changeroom. Eventually, he came bolting out.

"Oh boy, swimsuit girls! swimsuit girls! bikinis!" Yakko came out and eventually came to a complete halt...There was almost no one there, except for a few old people sitting in the hot tub and a middle aged asian man swimming laps in a speedo.

"Hey, What kinda hotel doesn't let pretty young girls come in here?" asked Yakko

Dot slapped her brother's head.

"Are girls all you think about?" she asked

"Yep." Yakko didn't take more than half a second to say so

"Well, at least I can control my..." Dot then got a look at a tall, dark and handsome man coming out of the men's changeroom.

"Never mind, I can't." Dot's eyes turned into hearts. Yakko figured it out quick enough.

"Girls. Go fig." He said

While dot walked away with her head in the clouds, Yakko walked over to the diving board and climbed his way up to the top. When he got to the top, he looked at the pool a few feet down from him. He could also see the world.

"Really? So that's what it looks like from up here." Yakko commented on what looked like a map of the United States and Canada below him.

"All the lines and words are so detailed." Yakko then pulled out a pair of binoculars to spy on the pool. His binoculars turned to the ladie's changeroom doorway, and to his suprise, out walked 2 very beautiful and tight girls.

"Buxom beauties at 4 o'clock...Actually quarter after." Yakko almost melted while looking at his watch

Meanwhile, Dot was chasing her newly found crush across the pool deck. He eventually sat down in the hot tub and then Dot plopped right down next to him.

"What? What are you?" he asked

"I'm in love..." Dot fluttered her eyes at the stranger

"Well I can tell...But aren't I a little too old for you?" he asked

"No one's too old for Dot Warner..." Dot then wrapped her arms around the stranger's neck and gave a big smooch on his lips. when she let go, he spat and stuff and turned away.

"You can't resist me forever, big man!" Dot snapped

"I can at least try." The man replied in a sarcastic voice

Dot turned to the camera.

"I love a man who plays hard to get." Said Dot

Meanwhile, back at the diving board, Yakko had done a sweet swan dive and landed square into the the pool and swam right up to the girls that he was spying on moments before. he popped out of the water and landed right in between them on his feet. He was hoping that the girls would be impressed, but his expectations were incorrect.

"What are you doing?" asked one of the girls

"Just testing the waters. You want to go for a swim with me? We can play little mermaid and i'll save you from drowning." Yakko winked at the camera

"Uh! you're weird!" Said the other girl, walking away with her girlfriend.

"Hey! Come back! I can play the prince too! Uh, girls can be so picky sometimes." Yakko sighed.

An hour seemed to go by rather quickly. Yakko would chase the girls and even sat down and chatted with the grandmothers in the hot tub while Dot would pester the man, even when his very beautiful wife came to sit with him. When it was almost 5, Yakko and Dot met up and planned to go.

"Well, that was some good exercise." Said Yakko

"Exercise? All you did was chase those walking barbie dolls over there." Said Dot

"Oh ya, says miss 'I-like-the-man-that-plays-hard-to-get.' I saw you and that guy!" Yakko shot back

"Hey! That's Princess Angelina Contessa Louisa Franana...Darn it!" Dot screwed up her infamous line again.

"It's Princess Angelina Contessa Louisa Francesca..." Yakko was cut off

"I know what it is!" Dot yelled

"Ok, ok." Yakko wanted to calm his sister down.

"And you're Mr. United States-Canada-Mexico-Panama." Dot began walking into the girl's Changeroom while Yakko intentionally followed her, but she didn't notice

"Yep, that's me alright." Said Yakko

Just as Yakko walked into the changeroom, he feasted his eyes on 2 more beautiful girls who were getting changed. They shrieked as they realized Yakko had walked in on them.

"Hey! What's the big deal!? Haven't you seen a boy before?" Yakko pretended to be innocent.

"GET OUT, YAKKO!" Dot shrieked at the top of her lungs as Yakko bolted for the men's room.

()()()()()

5 minutes later, Dot and Yakko went back upstairs.

"Hey kids, Did you have a good time?" asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"I would've if Yakko hadn't walked into the girl's changeroom!" Dot complained

"Hey, it was an accident." Lied Yakko

"Yakko, Ve know you, and zhat vas not an accident." Dr. Scratchnsniff sided with Dot

"Ha! You're in trouble!" Said Dot

"Shut up, Dottie!" Said Yakko

"Oh! That's it! You're dead now!" Dot went after Yakko for committing the ultimate sin in the Warner sibling circle...Call Dot Dottie and you die. However, the skirmish was broken up by Dr. Scratchnsniff who proceeded to grab the siblings and hold them down.

"Ok! Zhat's enough for both of you! Go and sit in your rooms for 5 minutes!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff.

"See what you did?" Yakko blamed his sister

"Oh, dry up!" Dot shot back at Yakko

Dr. Scratchnsniff sent the siblings into their rooms and awaited the dinner.

()()()


	13. Beautiful Shell, Ugly heart

Chapter 13 - Reconciliation and Pepperoni, Make-up and determination

The Suite's doorbell rang.

"Coming, coming!" Dr. Scratchnsniff said

Dr. Scratchnsniff opened the door to an aroma of 2 Pizzas.

"Mmm, zhey look like zhey taste great."

"Dat'll be 14.50, please." Said the delivery guy

"Keep ze change." Dr. Scratchnsniff fished a 10 and a 5 out of his pocket and handed it over to the pizza delivery guy.

"Thank you! And thank you for ordering from Dhaliwal Bhungal Sundher Sunny's Pizza place! We're cheap, cheap, cheap!" The pizza delivery guy walked off. Dr. Scratchnsniff closed the door and called the warner siblings.

"Wakko! Yakko! Dot! Pizza's here!" he blurted out, bringing the Warners bolting from their rooms.

"Oh boy! Pizza dinner!" Yakko happily cheered

But then Dr. Scratchnsniff grabbed Yakko's arm before he could open the Pizza box. He also then grabbed Dot's arm for the same reason.

"Are you 2 going to fight at ze dinner table? Cause if you are, you can go right back into your rooms for Za night." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

Yakko and Dot seemed to have calmed.

"We're going to behave!" Dot assured her guardian

"Besides, we signed a peace treaty." Said Yakko, holding up a piece of paper that read 'peace treaty' with his signature and Dot's right beside it.

"Oh Dat's nice." Said Dr. Scratchnsniff, letting the quarreling siblings loose.

Wakko was already grabbing the buns that held the pizza box lid off the pizza.

"Hey Wakko, you wanna save a bun for one of us?" asked Yakko, walking over to his seat

"Don't forget your cute little sister!" Dot spoke in a cute tone, as she sat down on her seat.

"Here, you guys can fight over this one." Wakko tossed one of the buns toward his siblings, who then proceeded to grab it and try to take the whole thing. But then they just decided it was better to split the bun in two because they didn't want Dr. Scratchnsniff on their case.

Throughout the dinner, the Warners and Dr. Scratchnsniff just sat and chewed their food and ate. Nothing truly special. Wakko was still keeping Wheel of fortune fresh in his mind, preparing for the challenge that awaited him the next day.

After dinner, The Warners all sat down and watched TV. Yakko pleaded with Dr. Scratchnsniff to switch over to the adult channel, But of course, Dr. Scratchnsniff didn't want Yakko to be going "Hellllllooooo Nurse" all night long, so his pleas were ignored. They ended up watching Wheel of Fortune (big suprise) so Wakko could keep honing his skills. It seemed possible that Wakko could pick up a big win the next day. After watching TV for a few more hours, the Warners all headed off to the bed, to prepare for tommorow's big challenge that awaited them.

()()()()

The next day was a long one. Yakko and Dot continued to quarrel like siblings do when they're bored, while Wakko just kept on playing wheel and studying, getting better at the game and figured out how to put together even bigger words.

Then the time came. 6 Pm, one hour before showtime. The Warners left their hotel room and headed over to the studio. When they arrived, Mark was already there, ready to prepare Wakko for his Television appearance.

"We're here!" Said Wakko, walking through the doorway into the studio.

"Perfect timing! Wakko, your opponents are not here yet, you're right on time. We'll need you to come on down to the make-up room to get you set up." said mark

"Make-up room? I don't wear make-up. I'm a boy." Said Wakko

"Oh, don't worry, it's just to make you look better for the lights and cameras and stuff, your best features show up better." Said Mark

While Wakko pondered what kind of make-up he'd be wearing, Mark turned to the other Warners and Dr. Scratchnsniff

"You can go and sit in the studio's seats if you like, or you can go and wait in the studio lounge." Said Mark

While Yakko and Dot played chase, Wakko was led off into the make-up room, where a lady began applying a light tone to Wakko's face to give him a more defined appearance. Of course, Wakko still didn't understand why he had to wear make-up, but was so excited and determined to win he didn't care.

So a half-hour passed and Wakko was ready for the stage. He was led to the greenroom, where Barbie was already in wait. Wakko sat down a few rows away from her, but then got closer to initiate a conversation.

"So...You gonna have fun tonight?" asked Wakko

Barbie turned to Wakko and had a smile on her face.

"Ya, i'm going to have fun. I'll beat you and that polyester numbskull and win a fortune." She said

"What? But i'm going to win." Said Wakko

"Oh, no, no, no. little boy. I'm not here to play a good game, i'm going to win."

But Wakko had no problem stating why he was going to win.

"I'm going to win, and you know why? Because I want to help the poor people in the cold! They're hungry and it's people who steal the kettles from the Salvation army that really make me mad!" Wakko almost went into his explosive mode

"Really? What makes you think those people deserve any help?" asked Barbie

Wakko was shocked. How could this beautiful woman be so heartless?

"Those people had the chance to be good before, now they just wander around, bumming off the hard working people who earn their food the right way. They deserve to be hungry. If you want to donate the $1,000 you'll get at the end of the game, that's ok, but when I win a fortune here, i'm going to buy myself everything i've ever wanted, as well as pay off my shopping debts."

Wakko was dumbfounded.

"How much are ya in debt?" He asked, not knowing it was an innappropriate question for someone his age.

"You know it's rude to ask a woman that question?" said Barbie

"No...But I also think it's rude to say a poor person shouldn't eat." Said Wakko, clearly angry.

Just then, Baloney the dinosaur burst into the room and ruined the mean atmosphere.

"Oh, boy! All set for playing a game of ABC's?" Baloney laughed like an idiot.

Barbie turned back to Wakko.

"But you'll agree with me that the dinosaur is an idiot?" she asked

"Yeah, I would." Wakko displaced the former conversation.

Baloney came and sat down between the 7-year old animaniac and the blonde bombshell.

"Are ya ready to play some games? Well, are ya?" Baloney laughed his idiotic laugh. Of course Barbie decided to be a little amusing.

"Gee, he's a little smarter than my ex-boyfriend." said Barbie

Wakko laughed a bit.

"Gee, your ex-boyfriend must be very smart!" Baloney put his arm around Barbie and laughed.

"I wonder if his parents were brother and sister." Barbie commented to the camera

Just then, the doorway opened and Mark was there.

"Ok guys, just one last thing before we go on stage - We're going to draw numbers to see where you will stand on stage." Said Mark

Mark then pulled out an envelope with 3 numbered cards in it. He pulled the cards out, and told the contestants to draw. Wakko drew first and pulled out the 2, signifying he'd be in the yellow podium. Barbie drew the 3, and got blue. Baloney then drew number 1, making him cheer and say "Yay!" repeatedly. When he calmed down, Mark continued to speak.

"Ok, 5 minutes to showtime. You guys ready?" asked Mark

All 3 contestants nodded.

"Alright, can we please get you guys on stage for the opening?" asked Mark

The 3 contestants walked out of the greenroom and into the hallway, where they were led down the corridor to the set. The audience was ready, and Wakko could see his siblings in the seats, waving at him. After waving back, Mark guided Wakko to the yellow podium where he would stand for the whole game, while Baloney got the red podium and Barbie got the blue one.

"Ok, one minute til showtime. When Pat and Vanna come out, start clapping." Said Mark.

Wakko waited patiently for the music to start. Then it happened. The lights lit up, the cameras went live, and the wheel spun on it's own.

"Zero hour. Have a good game guys!" Mark then disappeared off the stage.


	14. Dirty Japanese Produce (Round 1)

Chapter 14 - Unlucky first puzzle

"Wheel! Of! Fortune!" the crowd chanted, before they began to clap.

Wakko and his opponents were clapping as well. Well, Except for Baloney, who's arms were so short he couldn't clap.

"And Now, here's our hosts, Pat Sajak and Vanna White!" Said the announcer.

Then Pat and Vanna Walked out together. They seperated and Vanna went to the puzzle board while Pat went to the wheel.

"Welcome to Wheel everybody, We're about to start our game, but first we're going to meet the contestants. First, we've got Baloney, from, if I can read my cards right, school. Well, Baloney, can you tell us a little about yourself?" Asked Pat

"Hi! I'm Baloney and..." Baloney got cut off

"Oh that's nice!" Pat didn't want Baloney to go on and on "And next we have a real swell guy named Wakko Warner, From Burbank, California, How's it going, Wakko?" asked Pat

"I'm fine, Pat, how are you?" Wakko Replied

"I'm great, So it says on my card that you live at the Warner bros Studios with your Brother and sister, how is that?"

"Well, we live in the water tower."

"Oh...Ok. A 7 year old who lives in a water tower. Nothing neglectful about that. And finally, we have Barbara Nickson, A very talented, beautiful woman."

"Thank you, Patrick...can I call you Patrick?" asked Barbie, fluttering her eyes at the somewhat attractive Gameshow host

"Oh...Absolutely." Said Pat, smiling back at the cougar lady.

"Ok Patrick...If I could make a puzzle, i'd put U & I together." Barbie fluttered her eyes.

Pat shook his head back into position and into play.

"Ok, let's get this game underway, now you know the rules, you spin the wheel, you buy the vowels and you solve the puzzle. But also, Don't forget, we're live!"

The audience cheered.

"And since it's our special December 24th episode, We didn't tell anyone before, but there is a million dollar prize available in our bonus round, all you have to do is pick the right envelope!"

The audience clapped even louder. Wakko got even more excited, as this might be a chance for him to collect $1,000,000

"Our first category is...Thing."

[ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ]

"And we drew numbers in back to determine who gets to go first, and Baloney you drew No. 1."

"I am Number 1! Stupendous!" He said

"Great, now spin the wheel." Said Pat

Baloney slowly reached over and tried to reach the wheel with his stubby arms. Pat then just spun the wheel for him.

"Oh, goody! goody!" Said Baloney

The wheel landed on 250$.

"Ok, what letter would you like?" asked Pat

Baloney just stood there and thought.

"I?" asked Baloney

"No, Baloney, I is a Vowel." Said Pat

"No it isn't! I'll tell ya what it is!" Said Baloney

Baloney burst out into his "Imagine" song.

_I is for imagine, M is for me!_

_A is for the letter A, G is for Gee_

_I is for Imagine, N is for Nice_

_E is for Egad, I said Imagine twice!_

As Baloney's song ended, The buzzer went.

"Oh, I'm sorry Baloney, you took too much time." Said Pat

"Oh, Darn!" Said Baloney

"Now, Wakko, it's your turn to spin the wheel." said Pat

Wakko reached over, and spun the wheel as hard as he could. It landed on 700.

"700, do you have a letter?" asked Pat

"Can I get an S?" asked Wakko

"Sure you can, there are a few S's in the puzzle." Said Pat

Vanna strutted across the board and lit up the letters.

[S][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ][S][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ]

"You've got 1,400 Wakko, What are you gonna do?" asked Pat

"Pat, i'd like to buy a vowel!" Said Wakko, then turning to the camera "Right wheel this time!"

"Ok, what vowel would you like?" asked Pat.

"Let's buy the I." Said Wakko

"There is an I." Said Pat

[S][ ][I][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ][S][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ]

Baloney then spoke up.

"But I guessed I." Said Baloney

"Baloney, you have to buy your vowels." said Pat

Baloney stood there confused.

"Gosh Pat, I don't know what you're talking about!" said Baloney

"Well, that's not suprising." Barbie didn't hesitate to say.

"Well..." Without hesitation Pat turned to Wakko "Wakko, you've got 1,150 and it's your turn, what shall you do?" asked Pat

"I'll spin again." Said Wakko

Wakko spun the wheel until it landed on 550.

"Ok, what letter would you like?" asked Pat

"Um, an H?" asked Wakko

Sure, there are 2 H's." Said Pat

[S][H][I][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ][S][H][ ][ ][ ][ ]

in the seats, Yakko started getting nervous.

"Yakko, Vhy are you so nervous?" Asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"If...If the next letter's what I think it is..." Said Yakko

"Yakko, Please do not embarrass Vakko here!" Said Dr. Scratchnsniff

Wakko spun the wheel again. Unfortunately, his luck ran out as the wheel landed on lose a turn.

"Lose a turn, sorry Wakko." Said Pat

"Oh, why me?" asked Wakko

"It happens. Now Barbie, can I call you barbie?" asked Pat

"You can call me whatever you like, you sly devil, you!" Barbie giggled

Pat began melting like butter.

"O-oh-oh ok, spin the wheel." Said Pat

Then Barbie leaned over in her Black dress jacket and half-buttoned Dress shirt, showing a large portion of cleavage.

"I...love...Barbie..." Yakko's tongue nearly fell out of his mouth with excitement.

Even Dr. Scratchnsniff was enticed by what he saw.

"Sheesh, What's the big deal about her? She's not cute like me!" Dot went into her cute mode.

Barbie spun the wheel. It landed on 600.

"What letter would you like?" asked Pat

"Let's have a T" Said Barbie

"Yes there are 2 Ti...I mean T's."

The puzzle lit up the bad word, but since Yakko was so busy flying down barbie's top in his mind, he really didn't notice.

[S][H][I][T][T][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ][S][H][ ][ ][ ][ ]

"Can I buy the A?" asked Barbie

"T and A? Oh boy..." Pat got even more excited.

Yakko snapped out of his trance just one second to say "I'm definitely late to say it, but good night, everybody!"

"Uh, yeah there is an A." Said Pat

[S][H][I][T][T][A][ ][ ] [ ][ ][S][H][ ][ ][ ][ ]

"And now the O?" asked Barbie

"2 Oooooh's." Said Pat, very well worked over by Barbie's body.

[S][H][I][T][T][A][ ][ ] [ ][ ][S][H][ ][O][O][ ]

"I'd like to solve." said Barbie

"Solve anytime you like." Said Pat

()()()()()()


	15. A really bad cliffhanger (Round 2)

Chapter 15 - This Stinks!

()()()

"Is it...Shittake mushroom?" Asked Barbie

"Yes." Pat assured barbie's victory as Vanna lit up the puzzle.

()()()

With Barbie winning the first round (although not by much) Wakko had some catching up to do.

"Welcome back, folks! it's time for our jackpot round, in this round we have a jackpot space on the wheel and every time you land on a specific dollar amount, that amount is added to the jackpot, So a lot of money could be won here. We also have a prize, tell em Charlie!"

Then the big screen showed a special prize.

"It's a trip to the West Edmonton Mall, in Alberta, Canada! You and a guest will fly round trip coach from Los angeles to Alberta, Canada for a week-long shopping spree in the west edmonton mall! Plus, Spending cash! A terrific prize worth $5,500!"

The audience and the contestants clapped.

"Alright, The category for this next round is thing." Pat announced as the jingle to signal the puzzle was ready played.

[ ] [ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ]

"And since Baloney started the first round, Wakko, you get to start this round!" Said Pat

"Ok, Pat!" Wakko reached over and spun the wheel. It landed on $500.

"Uh...Can I get an S?" asked Wakko

"Yep, there is one." Pat watched Vanna light up the board.

[ ] [ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ][S][ ][ ][ ]

"What are you gonna do?" asked Pat

Wakko opted to spin the wheel again, this time giving it a good swing. And much to his delight, it landed on the prize wedge.

"Ok, Wakko, Let me have a letter."

"Um...Let's go with T." Said Wakko

"One T, Pick up that prize, that's worth $5,500."

Wakko began shaking with excitement as he picked up the $5,500 prize as Vanna lit up the letters. However, he had to solve the puzzle while still hanging onto the prize for him to win it.

[ ] [ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ][S][ ][ ][T]

"Um, Let's spin again." Said Wakko

Wakko Spun the wheel once again and this time landed on $900, a good spin by all means.

"Ok, Wakko, a letter please."

"I'll take an L if ya have one." Said Wakko

"We've got 3 L's for ya, But you can also take $2,700."

Wakko's score was adding up, as well as the jackpot round's total.

[ ] [ ][ ][ ] [L][ ][ ] [ ][ ] [ ][ ][L][L][S][ ][ ][T]

The jackpot amounted to 6,400 (It always started at 5,000 and would increase with every dollar amount hit) If Wakko could hit the jackpot spot and guess a letter, then guess the right answer to the puzzle, he could collect the jackpot, all cash. But landing on the jackpot spot wasn't going to be easy.

"I'll spin again." Said Wakko

Wakko spun again, and this time narrowly missed the bankrupt, and landed on $700.

"Get outta there!" Pat held his breath as the Rubber spike just barely got out of the black paint to land on the $700 mark.

"Phew! $700, Guess a letter, Wakko."

"OK! Is there a B?" asked Wakko

"Yep, there are some B's." Said Pat

"Where! Where! I don't like bees! They sting!" Baloney began freaking out

"Well ya shouldn't have gone sticking your hand into their hive for honey, it's not nice." Wakko taunted Baloney

"But I wanted the honey and I told the bees I was friendly!" Said Baloney

While Wakko and Baloney had their friendly banter, Vanna lit up a board that was looking even more suggestive than the last puzzle they had played.

[ ] [B][ ][ ] [L][ ][B] [ ][ ] [B][ ][L][L][S][ ][ ][T]

"Oh my god, are you kidding me!?" Yakko said from the audience

"Vhat do you mean, Yakko? Vakko's doing very vell!" Dr. Scratchnsniff reassured Yakko

"No, it's that puzzle! look at the last word and try and tell me what you think it is! What kind of sick writer do we have writing this fanfic?"

Back down at the podiums, Wakko's Score had accumulated from 500$ on his first spin, adding $2,700 to make $3,200, and now another 2,100 to make $5,300, not to mention the 5,500 prize had had in his grasp. If he could win this, he could cause Barbie to panic.

"Ok, Wakko, you've got $5,300, What are you gonna do?" asked Pat

"I'm still not sure...Can I buy a vowel?"

"Sure you may, what vowel would you like?" asked Pat

"A U?" asked Wakko

"Sure, one U, that'll cost you $250." Said pat

[ ] [B][ ][ ] [L][ ][B] [ ][ ] [B][U][L][L][S][ ][ ][T]

"Ok...How about the I?"

"Sure, 2 I's" Said Pat

[ ] [B][I][ ] [L][ ][B] [ ][ ] [B][U][L][L][S][ ][I][T]

"Hey! I have 2 eyes!" Said Baloney, who then burst into song again to the tune of 'twinkle twinkle, little star.'

_I have 2 very big eyes_

_I have 2 very big eyes_

_I Love my eyes so much, no doubt_

_even when a kid tried to poke them out.._

Baloney was cut off by Pat.

"Thank you, Baloney, that's very nice of you...now, Wakko, You're at 4,800, What are ya gonna do now?" asked Pat

"I'll spin again, maybe hit that nice jackpot!" Wakko thought about the $7,100 jackpot that was available to him.

But as he spun, the wheel came closer, and closer...and closer to the jackpot spot! Wakko held his breath but then let it all out on a turn for the worse...The wheel stopped on Lose-a-Turn.

"Oh, no! I'm so sorry, Wakko, you've lost your turn!" Said Pat

Wakko sighed in disappointment.

"Well, Barbie, it's your turn now." Said Pat

"I'll end this one by solving the puzzle." Said Barbie

"Ok, Barbie's gonna solve the Puzzle..."

Then Yakko butted in.

"...right after our last commercial break...Hey, it's the last one, ok? So keep your shirt on."

()()()()


	16. Not another commercial break!

Chapter 16 - Our Last Commercial break

()()()()

Miss Flamiel appeared on-screen.

"Hello, I'm Miss Flamiel, President of the "Ban the Archies" Campaign."

Miss Flamiel held up an Archies issue.

"These comics are ruining our country! We must ban them! Just look at this atrocious Cover!" Miss Flamiel held up a cover with Veronica in a Skimpy Bikini.

"This girl is sending a bad message to any young women looking at her! She's sending the message that if you want a boy to like you, you have to wear less and less clothing!"

Miss Flamiel threw the comic into a nearby fireplace.

"Which is why we've started the 'Ban the Archies' Campaign! Heck, the Archie people banned Fanfiction, So the golden rule applies here! We're asking for pledges and copies of old issues of that disgusting comic! So pledge now!"

Then Yakko appeared on screen, reading an Archie comic.

"I used to read Archie comics all the time!" Yakko threw the comic aside "But I was only reading them just so I could see what Midge's belly button looked like in a bandeau swimsuit! I had no idea I was hurting Pixie-haired girls all over the world by oogling an animated teen in a skimpy swimsuit!" Yakko pretended to talk dramatically

Then Dot appeared on screen with a short hairdo and a swimsuit.

"Oh, You're hurting me by reading those comics, Yakko! You're hurting short-haired girls everywhere!" Dot pretended to act hurt

"Awww, i'm sorry pixie-haired girl! But i've learned the error of my ways...Until the next issue comes to my mailbox!" Yakko winked at the camera.

Then the shot returned to Miss Flamiel

"So now that you've seen what we do, Will you pledge? Pledge 5$! Pledge $100! It's going to be a cold christmas this year, so use your old archie comics for kindling! It's the right thing to do! Pledge today!"

()()()()

The Next commercial was for Pinky and the Brain's Take over the world campaign. Pinky and the Brain appeared on screen in nice suits.

"Gee, Brain, What are we gonna do tonight?" asked Pinky

"The same thing we do every night, Pinky! Try and take over the world! And to do that, we need money. So we are asking you, loyal Animaniacs viewers, to send us your money and pledges so we can take over your world!"

"Oh Brilliant, Brain! Brilliant, oh no, wait, nope, we can't. We don't have a good commercial." Said Pinky

"Pinky, We just need to show a montage of cute kittens and dogs in cages and add in some sad music and people will be so overcome by sadness and guilt, they'll have to pledge their money!" Said Brain

"Oh, Brilliant Brain! You amaze me!" Said Pinky

"I always amaze you, Pinky. it's easy."

Then a montage of kittens and puppies played while "In the arms of an angel" by Sarah McLachlan played. At the end of it, Pinky was soaked in his tears while Brain was standing there, emotionless as always.

"So you see, We now have you so guilt ridden that you have no idea your money is being donated right to us." Brain spoke in his monotone voice, before turning to a teary-eyed pinky.

"Pinky, are you pondering what i'm pondering?"

Between sobs, Pinky spoke "I think so, Brain, But how many yolks are in a carton of eggnog?"

Brain turned back to the camera to avoid the urge of smacking his dumb associate.

"So donate your money to the Brain's take over the world campaign. Donate $1,000 dollars and i'll personally make you my right hand man!"

Then the commercial ended with the Warners singing "They're dinky, they're pinky and the brain, brain, brain, brain".

()()()()

The last commercial featured Slappy the Squirrel

"Hey! It's Slappy here. Ya remember me? I used to be on TV back in the days when you could throw anythin' on the air and they would show it, with almost no commercials. But now every program's got all these darned commercial breaks and I say we do somethin' about it! So here's the Slappy the Squirrel's no more commercials campaign!"

Slappy walked across the set with Skippy.

"Ya see, They're puttin' all these commercials on the air with these kids toys in em so your children are gonna scream until you buy them the toy to shut em up."

Then skippy looked at a screen advertising a toy.

"Hey Aunt Slappy, can we get that! It's sooooo cool!" Skippy begged

Slappy took a closer look, and then replied. "The toy's made in China. It'll be broke in a week."

To which Skippy began crying and begging.

"So is this how you want ya kids to be? Cryin' and beggin' ya for more toys and stuff they see on TV.." Slappy couldn't continue through Skippy's crying.

"Hey! Skippy! Ya can stop cryin' now!" Said Slappy

Slappy then stopped crying.

"Ok, Aunt Slappy!" Skippy replied

"Good job actin'. Now go get yerself a donut and a coffee." Slappy sent skippy off the set, and returned.

"So what i'm askin' ya for, is that you send us your donations and we'll put them to good use to get these darned commercials off the air! Send us a donation of $5,000, and Skippy there will mow ya lawn for free!" Slappy advertised her Nephew's talents

"I'm a lawnmowin' expert!" Said Skippy

Slappy turned to the camera "He's been so hopped up on those John Deere commercials he thinks he's an expert." Before going back to her normal pose "So donate today, and I swear we'll get all these stinkin' commercials off TV! Now enough with commercials, let's get back to the show!"

Then the Warners popped up on the screen to sing "That's Slappy!"

And the normal "Slappy Squirrel" Screen that would fall into the frame was replaced with "And now...Back to the story!" with a subtitle that read "No more commercial breaks, we promise."


	17. Wakko needs to take a P (Round 3)

Chapter 17 - Wakko needs to take a P

()()()()

With the Commercial break over, Barbie could now solve the puzzle which had been on a cliffhanger for a while.

"Is it a big lob of bullspit?" Asked Barbie

"Yes, it is!" Said Pat, as Vanna lit up the puzzle board.

Wakko looked down in disappointment as his huge rack-up got erased. That could've really done a good deed for the Salvation Army. Meanwhile, Pat was congratulating Barbie on her 2nd win in a row.

"Well, we have a house minimum of 1,000 per round, so that brings your score up to 2,000, all cash. But we still have a few more rounds to go, still anyone's game, let's take a break, and when we come back, we'll play round 3, don't go away!"

While the studio cameras stopped rolling for a few minutes, the make-up guy came to apply more makeup to Wakko's face.

"Anything I can get for you guys?" asked Mark, who walked on-stage.

"A water, please?" asked Barbie.

"I'll take a pepsi if ya have one." Wakko asked

Baloney just stood there, acting dumb as always.

"Sure thing. We're back on the air in 5." Mark ran off to get the drinks. While he was gone, Barbie looked at Wakko and smiled her evil self.

"Well, look who's winning?" She said

"I'll come back and win. Just you wait." Wakko spoke with Determination

"Really, little thing? What makes you think you can? The only reason you're out here is for ratings. They know you won't win. They just want more people to watch." Barbie kept putting down poor Wakko.

Wakko was near ready to flip. But his moral standards forced him to hold it down. If he could win, then he could shoot his mouth off if he wanted.

_"I'll win. You'd better make your words as sweet as your looks, not as bitter as your heart." _Wakko thought to himself.

Mark returned with a bottled water and a can of pepsi. While they drank, they stood in wait for the competition to resume.

"Ok, We're on in 10 seconds." Said Mark

Wakko finished the can and placed it behind his podium so no one could see. Barbie did the same.

"5...4...3...2..." The cameraman pointed at Pat.

"Welcome back to Wheel of fortune, everybody. It's time for round 3, this will give our contestants a chance to land on the $2,000 space on the wheel. The category this round, is Occupation."

[ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ]

"And this round, Barbie will start." Said Pat

Barbie leaned over and spun the wheel. It landed directly on the $2,000 mark.

"Ok, Barbie, what letter would you like?" asked Pat

"Is there a T?" she asked

"2 T's, $4,000 for them." Said Pat, as Vanna Lit up the puzzle board's letters.

[ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][T][ ][ ][ ][T]

But then Wakko started fidgeting. The pepsi he drank was starting to catch up to his bladder.

Barbie spun the wheel again, this time landing on $900.

"Can I get an R?" asked Barbie

"Yep, one R."

Vanna lit up the puzzle while Wakko began feeling the pressure in his bowels.

[ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][T][R][ ][ ][T]

_"I have to potty!"_Wakko didn't want to blurt it out loud.

"Can I buy a vowel?" asked Barbie "I?"

"There's 2 I's." Said Pat

[ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][I][ ][T][R][I][ ][T]

_"Potty, potty, potty, potty!" _Wakko was having a hard time holding it in.

"I'll spin again." Said Barbie, spinning the wheel once again. And like before, it landed on 2,000.

"2,000, what letter would you like?" asked Pat

"An S!" said Barbie

"Yes, there are 2 S's" Vanna lit up the board even more.

[ ][S][ ][ ][ ][I][ ][T][R][I][S][T]

Barbie then spun the wheel once again. it turned, and turned and turned, before slowing down near the bankrupt space.

"Oh no!" Pat exclaimed, before the Rubber spike stopped entirely on Bankrupt, erasing the 8,000 plus that Barbie had accumulated.

"Oh, i'm so sorry, Barbie." Said Pat

"It's ok." said Barbie, obviously lying. When you lose over 8 grand, it's not ok.

"Now, it's Baloney's turn. Baloney, what are you gonna do?" asked Pat

"Can I Solve the puzzle?" asked Baloney

Pat looked a little stunned.

"Ok, go ahead." Said Pat

"Is it Dog?" asked Baloney

The buzzer sounded to inform the whole world that Baloney had indeed guessed incorrectly.

"No it is not. Wakko, your turn. You'll probably want to spin." Said Pat

Wakko, holding in his urge to potty, grabbed the wheel and spun. But as the rubber spike slapped the stakes on the wheel, Wakko's bowels fired up again. Now he really had to potty. But luckily, the Wheel landed on $2,000.

"2,000! Ok, Wakko, Give me a letter." Said Pat

Wakko couldn't hold the urge much longer.

"Pat! I have to take a Pee!" Yelled Wakko

"There is a P! $2,000 for it!" Pat seemed to be oblivious to Wakko's discomfort.

[P][S][ ][ ][ ][I][ ][T][R][I][S][T]

But Wakko, in his discomfort, figured out the word and wanted to solve.

()()()()()


	18. The Conspiracy (Round 4)

Chapter 18 - The Conspiracy

"It's P-sychiatrist!" Wakko blurted out

"We'll accept that!" Pat got the confirmation from the judges.

Wakko continued to fidget around while Pat came over to congratulate him.

"Congratulations Wakko, you've won $2,000, you're tied with Barb..." Then Pat realized Wakko was all jumpy. "What's wrong?" he asked

"I have to potty!" Wakko ran off-stage while the audience laughed a bit. Pat himself couldn't hold back a few chuckles.

"Well, We'll take another break, when we come back, hopefully Wakko will be done his! Don't go away!" Pat smiled as the cameras cut away.

()()()()

A few minutes later, Wakko came out of the men's room (And yes, he did wash his hands) Only for Mark the contestant Co-ordinator to meet up with him.

"You OK, Wakko?" asked Mark

"I'm better now. Probably shouldn't have had that pepsi."

"Don't worry about it. Listen, everyone's backstage, we're gonna do something special in the next round, so come with me." Said Mark

Wakko was a little bit nervous.

Mark led Wakko into the greenroom, where Pat, Vanna, and Barbie were all there.

"What's going on?" asked Wakko

"We gotta get that polyester numbskull out of here." Said Pat

"I'm willing to let him win a round just so he can be happy." Said Barbie

So the group devised a plan to get rid of Baloney.

()()()

The cameras began rolling again to signify the beginning of Round 4.

"Welcome back, everybody. Thankfully, Wakko has done what needed to be, so let's get ready for round 4, and the category is Thing."

[ ][ ][ ]

"And Baloney, You get to go first!" said Pat

"Oh, goody!" Baloney again tried to spin the wheel, but this time it automatically spun and landed on the 250$ space.

"Ok, Baloney, Guess a letter."

"Hmmm...Is there an X?" asked Baloney

"Yes, there is a D, 250$ for it." Said Pat, While Vanna lit up the puzzle.

[D][ ][ ]

Baloney was a little bit confused.

"But D isn't an X." Said Baloney

"Ok, you'll spin the wheel!" Said Pat, ignoring Baloney.

The wheel spun automatically and landed on 200$.

"Um...Is there a Q?" asked Baloney

"Yes! there is a G, a 200$ for it." said Pat

[D][ ][G]

"Hmmmm...What do I do here?" asked Baloney

"Yes! That's right! Dog is the answer!" the studio clapped for Baloney as Vanna lit up the last letter to reveal the word Dog in the puzzle.

Pat came over to congratulate Baloney.

"Congratulations, You've won 450! and a special prize! Tell em, Charlie!" Said Pat

Then Charlie made the announcement.

"Baloney! you get to take a free Ride in our Wheel of Fortune Catapult!" Said Charlie

"Oh, Fun, fun fun!" Baloney jumped into the catapult's scoop to be launched.

"Ready, Baloney?" asked Pat

"Sure am, Pat! Let's have some Fun, fun, Fun! Yay!" Baloney remained oblivious to the fact that his opponents and the staff had totally conspired to get rid of him.

Then Pat pulled the lever, and Baloney was flung out of the studio and thousands of miles away.

"Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" Baloney smiled as he was flung away.

As he disappeared, the studio sighed a breath of relief.

"Oh...man. Now we gotta take another break, we'll come back! don't go away!"

()()()()()


	19. Lucky hands of Sajak (Speed-up Round)

Chapter 19 - Sajak's lucky hands

When the break ended, Baloney had left the set and was never to return, much to Wakko's, Barbie's, Pat's and Vanna's Delights. By now, the game was very close between Wakko and Barbie. However, the show was running short on time.

"Our next category is "Movie title" and Vanna will.." Pat was cut off by a dinging noise, indicating they were short on time.

"Not much time left, so i'll give the wheel a final spin..." Pat then spun the wheel "..And i'll ask you to give me a letter in the puzzle, you'll have 3 seconds to solve it, Vowels worth nothing, consanants are gonna be worth..."

Then the wheel landed directly on 5000. The crowd cheered loudly, a lot of money was about to given away. This of course made Wakko nervous, as Barbie was much better at solving puzzles than he was and definitely had more pop culture knowledge.

"I'll remind you, The category is movie title."

Wakko looked at the puzzle. he was hoping he might be able to find a crucial letter somewhere in the puzzle.

[ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ]

"Wakko, it is your turn, we need a letter, please."

Wakko took a second and then said the first letter that seemed to work for him.

"P?" asked Wakko

"Not another P, I hope?" asked Pat

"Not unless ya let me drink pepsi." Wakko joked

Pat laughed a bit and said that there was a P.

[ ][P][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ]

When Wakko's 3 seconds were up, Barbie got her turn.

"S?" asked Barbie.

"One S. you'll get 3 seconds."

[S][P][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ]

The buzzer sounded and wakko immediately took his turn.

"T?"

"One T. 3 seconds."

[S][P][ ][ ][ ][T][ ][ ] [ ][ ][ ][ ]

His time ran out and Barbie guessed a letter.

"A?"

"Yes, a few A's, no money for vowels but you get 3 seconds." Now Wakko had to start putting words together and guessing what that smaller word was.

[S][P][ ][ ][ ][T][ ][ ] [A][ ][A][ ]

"Wakko, your turn, a letter please?" asked Pat

"W as in Wakko!" Wakko smiled to cover his nervousness.

"One, 3 seconds." Said Pat

[S][P][ ][ ][ ][T][ ][ ] [A][W][A][ ]

Wakko figured that last word was "Away". But he would not be able to cash in on the letter Y.

"Barbie, your turn, a letter please."

"Y!" Barbie said almost immediately to add 5,000 to her bank.

[S][P][ ][ ][ ][T][ ][ ] [A][W][A][Y]

Barbie looked at the puzzle, but had no clue what the first word was. then the buzzer sounded.

"Wakko, a letter please?" asked Pat

"L?" Asked Wakko

"No L, Barbie, your turn." Said Pat

"a D!" Barbie might have figured it out.

One D, let it come up, you'll have 3 seconds.

[S][P][ ][ ][ ][T][ ][D] [A][W][A][Y]

"Speeded away!" Said Barbie

"Nope, still time." Said Pat

"Uh, Sprinted away!" Barbie then ran out of time.

"Wakko, your turn, a letter please." asked Pat

"An r?" asked Wakko

"One R." Said Pat "only vowels left, do you know what it is?" asked Pat

[S][P][ ][R][ ][T][ ][D] [A][W][A][Y]

(A.N. take a guess at it now, the answer is revealed right away.)

Then it hit Wakko like an anvil.

"Pat! It's Spirited away!" Said Wakko

Then the puzzle lit up, and Wakko's siblings went completely ballistic. Wakko had overcome near impossible odds to win the game. In the blue podium, Barbie could not believe it...she had just been beat by a young boy. Pat came over to congratulate Wakko.

"Congratulations, Wakko! $2,000 plus the $20,000 from this, altogether $22,000, all cash, he's goin' to the Bonus round!" Said Pat

The Audience cheered. Then of course, Pat came over to Barbie.

"Well, Sorry Barbie, the wheel gave ya some trouble, but $2,000 isn't too bad, thanks for bein' here." Pat then extended his hand to Barbie, who in turn walked off set without doing the same. Pat then turned back to Wakko and shook his hand.

"Well, all of your opponents are gone now, it's time for the bonus round, there's also that $1,000,000 prize! Everyone watching, Don't go away!"

Then the cameras cut. The next round would either set Wakko up or either leave him with a small fortune.

()()()()()


	20. Pandemonium and Silence (Final Puzzle)

Chapter 20 - Pandemonium and Silence

()()()()

After the commercial break ended, Wakko was ready for the final puzzle.

"$22,000, all cash, You've done really well so far Wakko." Said Pat

"Thank you, Pat." Said Wakko

"Now, We need you to pick a letter from the 5 available there."

Wakko looked very closely at the W, H, E, E, and L in front of him. There was a 20% Chance he would pick the Million-dollar Envelope. Somehow, his mind was drawing him to the second E. it just seemed like the right one to pick. Wakko drew the second E from the set and passed the envelope to Pat.

"Thank you, Wakko, and now our Bonus round Puzzle, is Fictional Character, R,S,T,L,N, E, Vanna will reveal the letters in this puzzle." The Screen showed Wakko's head in a small circle in the bottom right while he watched Vanna light up the board.

[ ][ ][R][ ][E][N] [S][ ][N][ ][ ][E][ ][ ]

"Alright, We need 3 more consanants, Plus a Vowel." Pat turned to Wakko.

Wakko looked at the puzzle board. He had absolultely no clue what the name could've been. It was a fictional character, So that narrowed the playing field a bit.

"Um...F...H...G...and O." Said Wakko, causing Vanna to reveal more of the puzzle.

[ ][ ][R][ ][E][N] [S][ ][N][ ][ ][E][G][O]

"Ok, Wakko. 10 seconds, Take a shot at it, good luck." Then the sounds of the timer slowly ticking down forced Wakko to think harder about what the answer could be.

"uh..." Wakko was blank for about 5 seconds.

4 seconds ticked by before Wakko blurted out the only answer it could be.

"Carmen Sandiego!" Wakko said as clearly and loudly as possible. What came next was the cheers and applause of the impressed audience watching the young Warner finally come to the end of what was a somewhat difficult road.

When Wakko was done jumping all over the place, Pat called him over.

"Ok, Wakko, you ready to look in here?" asked Pat

"I'm ready!" Wakko was more than excited.

Pat opened the envelope, then closed it back up quickly.

"You know, We've come a long way since 1974. Back then we were giving away just 3-figure sums to adults." Pat then opened up the envelope for the world to see. "Now to a 7-year old boy, we're giving away $1,000,000."

The audience cheered louder than ever before. Wakko went even more ballistic as his siblings ran down to hug and kiss him and congratulate him on his victory.

"We knew you could it, Wakko!" Dot hugged her brother tightly

"Atta boy!" Yakko high-fived his victorious sibling

Amidst the commotion, Pat got close to Wakko and asked him a question that cataclysmed into something special.

"So Wakko, You've just won 1,000,000, plus 22,000. What are you gonna do with all that money?" He asked

Without taking a breath, Wakko said "I'm giving it all to the salvation army."

Then, the crowd that was once loud, became silent.

"Say that again, Wakko?" asked Pat

"I'm giving it all to the Salvation army." Said Wakko

Then the silence was broken by a single man's clap. That man got up out of the stands while everyone there just stood silently, frozen in time.

"I think our boy just discovered the true meaning of christmas!" Said the man

Wakko was really confused.

"Who are you?" he asked

"Remember that time you and your siblings were in the short little drummer Warners?" asked the man

"I remember." Said Wakko

"And remember how you were singing your version of little drummer boy to the baby Jesus?" asked the man

"Uh-huh."

"That little baby...is the reason people give gifts. Just like he was given to you and everyone living on the earth. That's why they call it christmas. Cause jesus's last name is Christ. make sense?" asked the man

Wakko could totally understand.

"And that...that is the true meaning of christmas. What I gave you and the world 2000 years ago. That little baby in the manger."

Wakko now understood entirely.

"Now I gotta go back. my son's celebrity status is different come easter." then the figure disappeared into thin air, While Wakko returned to his human world to cheers from the audience who had just heard his plans.

"No, no, no, no, Wakko. You just don't give away a million and some dollars just like that!" Said Pat

"Well I am." Wakko spoke without hesitation.

Then the studio went to commercial break. Almost immediately, Wakko was approached by the contestant co-ordinator, Mark.

"First of all, Congratulations on Winning the game, Wakko!" Mark congratulated the youngest contestant ever.

"Thank you." Wakko replied

"However, we need to discuss this, donating all your money away thing. And we need to discuss this, immediately, backstage." Said mark

Mark led Wakko to the greenroom. Wakko's siblings and Dr. Scratchnsniff followed.

"Please sit."

Wakko did as such, and his siblings and guardian did the same.

"Wakko, You just won over a million dollars on a nationally televised gameshow. On top of that, you're the youngest contestant ever to do so. You cannot just go up after the game and say 'I'm donating it all to the salvation army.' like that!"

Wakko was somewhat confused. It was his money, he could do whatever he darn well pleased with it.

"Is zhere some sort of legality issue by saying zhat charity name on air Vithout zheir knowing?" Asked Dr. Scratchnsniff

"Not really, but it's just not right for a 7-year old to just give away a chance at a headstart on his future! Wakko, do you realize what $1,000,000 could do for you?"

"It could feed lots of starving children."

Mark just couldn't believe Wakko's pure determination.

"Who coached you to say what you said out there?" asked Mark

"No one." Replied Wakko

"We told him to keep whatever he won." Said Yakko

Mark couldn't believe his ears.

"Well..." Mark continued "...as part of tonight's special, We're directly depositing the winnings into the contestants accounts. As of tonight, that million and some dollars is yours."

"Thank you." Said Wakko

"I hope you reconsider, Wakko. That money could set you and your family up for life." Said Mark, before beginning to walk away.

Wakko looked up at Dr. Scratchnsniff.

"Should we call the Salvation army people?" asked Wakko

"I can place a call immediately. But think about it, Vakko. Vunce zhis money is gone, you cannot just ask for it back."

"Do it. The money was always theirs, I just had to win it." Said Wakko

"Ok, But i'm going to give you ze phone. you talk to zhem."

The phone began to ring, And then the ring was stopped by a voice.

"Salvation army HQ, What can I do for you?" asked the lady on the other end.

"Who do I ask about donations?" asked Wakko

"You can talk to me, How much are you going to donate?" asked the lady

"One million, and 22 thousand dollars." Said Wakko

Then the phone went dead silent.

"Ok, if this is a joke, we can trace the call..."

"No, no! it's real! I'm Wakko Warner, I was just on Wheel of fortune!" Said Wakko

The voice remained quiet for a second.

"Would you hold on for a few moments, i'll get right back to you." Said the voice

Then the phone began playing some soft hits of the 90's.

"Oh really? Why can't they put real music during these long waits?" asked Yakko

After a 2 minute wait, the phone woke up again, this time it was a man's voice.

"Excuse me, did you say your name was Wakko Warner?" asked the voice

"Yeah, I did." Wakko replied

"Listen, son. My name is William Coxe, I'm the current general of this charitable organization. I was just watching your episode of wheel of fortune, and I just want to say thank you for thinking of donating your winnings to us."

"You're welcome."

"Gotta admit, Watching that dimwitted dinosaur fly off made me laugh."

Wakko chuckled a little.

"But..." Mr. Coxe took a short breath "I cannot take that much from you, I would not feel right."

Wakko was ready to almost start crying. When was anyone going to stand with him in his plan of charity?

"Yes you can! I'm giving you the money! I don't need it!"

"Son, you don't just give away $1,000,000 like that! We cannot accept it, I'm sorry!"

Just then, Contestant Co-ordinator Mark came into the greenroom.

"Wakko, we want you to come out onto the stage for a moment. Our executive producer wants to talk. Keep that phone on too."

Back out onto the studio floor, Wakko kept on talking with the Salvation army people.

"I can see you on the stage, Wakko." Mr. Coxe spoke into the phone.

"Ok, so we're on live now." Said Wakko, looking into the camera. As he looked, Pat, Vanna, and executive producer Marty Friedguy were there.

"Wakko, What you're doing right now, is truly amazing, almost no one would ever think to do that." Said Mr. Friedguy

Wakko didn't know what to say anymore.

"Now, I've also been talking with a few of the treasurers of the Salvation army, and I stand by them by saying, that you can't give away your money."

Wakko didn't feel like holding his head up any longer.

"But...I will tell you what's going to happen. On behalf of Merv Griffin Productions, We will, in your place, Donate the $1,000,000 to the Salvation Army."

The crowd clapped and cheered, along with Pat and Vanna, and Wakko's Siblings. Wakko extended his hand to mr. Friedguy and thanked him.

"Thank you. That means a lot to me." Said Wakko

Then the cameras stopped rolling and the show ended right there.

()()()()()


	21. Merry christmas, Warners

Chapter 21 - Merry Christmas, Warners

()()()

Once the show had wrapped up, Wakko and his siblings were treated to a post-game banquet. This delighted Wakko greatly as he indulged on some of the best food ever prepared. Yakko and dot were just happy to see their brother this way, particularly since they never had such nice things. And even though he had next to nothing, Wakko wanted to be charitable.

After the banquet, The siblings returned to the hotel for the night, and on christmas morning, would immediately return home.

()()()

When the Warners returned home on christmas morning, The Warner movie lot was decorated with multiple christmas trees and ornaments. Of course, the siblings all wanted to open presents, as it was indeed christmas morning. They were not expecting much, as they were taken care of by Dr. Scratchnsniff and to an extent, Hello nurse. But of all things, there was something awaiting wakko, yet again. Hello Nurse had a letter for Wakko.

"Merry Christmas, Wakko!" Nurse said upon seeing Wakko after he exited Dr. Scratchnsniff's van.

"Merrrrrry Christmas, Nurse!" Yakko and Wakko didn't skip a beat from their regular routine. This time it made the nurse laugh.

"Wakko, I've got a letter for you. It's from my superiors."

Nurse handed the letter to Wakko, who immediately opened it and read what was written to him.

_Dear Wakko Warner_

_It's Mr. Coxe again. I wanted to formally thank you in writing. I hope you will understand that we here at The Salvation Army cannot take that much money from someone at a young age. But you can rest assured that the $1,000,000 we did recieve from the wheel of fortune people will be put to great use, Including food, clothing, and toys for poor children, as well as shelters for the homeless._

_Also, We know why you wanted to donate. It's that wonderful lady you refer to as nurse. She and Dr. Scratchnsniff told us everything. The theft from a few weeks back, the fact your siblings applied for you after watching an episode in which you knew all the puzzles, and then the days of practice. _

_So to show our appreciation on christmas, You and your siblings have a bunch of presents from us sitting out in the lot. You deserve it._

_Sincerely,_

_William Coxe_

When Wakko was finished reading, tears of joy flowed from his eyes.

"Hey! Wakko! come open some gifts with us!" Dot yelled out from underneath a big tree in the centre of the lot.

"Come on, Wakko! it's your christmas too!" Yakko added

Wakko came bolting over and looked at what the salvation army people had brought. Dot was opening up a big box, and inside, was a cute little pink scooter!

"Oh, it's soooooo cool!" Dot jumped onto the scooter, and turned the ignition, and bolted around the lot.

Meanwhile, Yakko opened up a small present, and inside, was a letter. It read as follows;

_Dear Yakko Warner_

_This is Michelle Pfieffer. You and me have a date._

Yakko's eyes lit up something bright.

"Hellllllllooooo Elvira Hancock!" Yakko drooled a little.

Dot came barrelling back on her scooter, and stopped to open her second present of many. Inside of that present, was a certificate from the Flairol Make-up company, promising bi-weekly shipments of makeup for a year.

Then wakko opened up his first present, the biggest of the bunch. inside, was a brand new, 46 inch TV. How he was going to get that up into the tower was anyone's guess.

()()()()

That night, After watching tons of christmas specials on Wakko's 46 inch tv, the Siblings crawled into their beds, ready to sleep for the whole night until boxing day the next morning.

But of all the siblings in the tower, the most content was definitely Wakko. Not only did he have a great bunch of gifts and the million dollars plus waiting for his pocket, not only did he help what might be hundreds to thousands of people, He got the greatest gift of all.

He learned the true meaning of christmas.

()()()()

THE END


	22. The Wheel of Morality

The final Chapter - The Wheel of Morality

The Warners ran down the icy path into the park.

"It's that time again!" Said Yakko

"To look at bikini models in the sears catalogue?" asked Wakko

"To look at speedo models in the sears catalogue?" asked Dot

"Nope, it's time to learn today's lesson...and to find out what it is, We turn to, the Wheel of morality!"

Yakko spun the wheel.

"Wheel of morality, turn, turn, turn. Tell us the lesson we must learn."

The wheel landed on moral number 7.

"and the moral of today's story is..." Yakko ripped the paper from the printer and read it.

"Christmas means many things. It's up to you to decide what you want it to mean. We just picked the religious meaning because Spielberg is Jewish."

"That kind of makes me feel all kind of warm and squishy. Either that or i'm made out of sponges." Said Dot

"I feel so much better after that moral." Said Wakko

"I'm glad you're touched." Said Yakko

Then the Warners yelled "Yikes!" and ran away as Ralph the security guard came to catch them.

()()()


	23. Bonus Features (Use your DVD remote)

Bonus Features - Story facts

()()()()

A.N.; These are pieces of trivia from the fanfic which are written in 3rd person by Phil from Produce.

- This story was still incomplete when the first chapters were posted. This was the first time in about 3 years that author Phil from Produce has done this. He likes to finish writing the fanfic entirely before posting the first chapter. The reason he didn't do so this time, was to make sure his story would be posted at the right times, as well as not being able to finish in time.

- Unfortunately, Dr. Scratchansniff is spelled Dr. Scratchnsniff, Without an A. By the time the author realized this, it was too late, the first few chapters were posted. He just decided to post the rest this way.

-Chapter 8 was not originally a commercial break. Originally, it was Wakko having a dream/nightmare where he met a figure who explained the christian meaning of christmas. However, the author thought it was too dark and serious at that point for an Animaniacs fic, so he changed it and added jokes. still feeling that it was too dark, He scrapped the idea of Wakko's nightmare and added in a commercial break instead.

-HOWEVER, during the posting of the chapters, Phil from Produce was watching the Animaniacs Christmas episodes, And saw the short "Little drummer Warners" for the first time and says "If I was more emotional, I probably would've cried tears of joy because that was just so awesome how animaniacs referenced Jesus like that." and instead of a dark chapter 8, a reference to the christian meaning of christmas near the end, as well as in the bonus features.

-The joke where Wakko "Has to take a P" is actually stolen directly from an episode of Wheel of fortune (In Particular, the episode that aired April 1st, 1997.) In which Pat Sajak and Vanna White were playing the game (With Alex Trebek hosting and Pat Sajak's real-life Wife being the hostess.) And during his turn, Pat jokingly said "I'd like to take a P." Of course, it was the april fools episode.

-Yakko's joke about Bubsy the bobcat's show (About the cheques clearing) was a joke made by Rob Paulsen during a cartoon convention. Rob Paulsen voiced both Yakko & Bubsy the bobcat.

-The Sungl"asses" joke actually came spontaneously to the author while he was writing the chapter. He saw the word "ass" and knew he had to make a joke out of it.

-The "Just shoot me" puzzle story that the author wrote at the end of chapter 3 was indeed real.

-The 2nd round puzzle "A big lob of bullspit" Was originally going to be "I don't like sand." which is a quote from star wars episode 2.

-During writing, Phil got to see the movie Spirited away for the first time, and decided to make it the speed round puzzle. This was not his first Studio Ghibli film (That honor went to "The Secret world of Arrietty" which he saw in his local theatre in 2012) and has since become a fan of Studio Ghibli's films.

-Dot is the Spokeswoman for the Tammel toy company, a parody of Mattel. (the letters are switched in the name)

-Originally, Barbie was going to be a Michael jackson impersonator. But the author thought it would be better to add a shallow woman instead so Wakko would have more determination to win the game.

-However, it was the author's intention the whole time to have Baloney as one of Wakko's opponents.

-When Yakko talks about the "Secretary that Shamu almost ate last week." it was a light reference to Ann Godsey, The survivor of a whale attack from 1972, which has been seen numerous times on various documentaries. During the attack, her bikini bottoms slid down for a few seconds, Which explains the censorship part of the joke.

-Yakko references the 2000 documentary "Dolphins" and says "The lady scientist doesn't wear a wetsuit." This was a reference to Phil from Produce's childhood, from the year 2000 (When Phil was 9 years old) and saw the documentary "dolphins" at science world. All he remembered was that marine biologist Kathleen Dudzinski wore a red swimsuit and had a great body.

-The story was written starting from about 3 Pm on November 11th, 2013 to 1:45 on December 15th, 2013, With the final chapter scheduled to be posted on Christmas day.

-There are almost no puns or jokes in the last 3 chapters (Not including the Wheel of Morality) This is when the true moral of the story is set in.

-Originally, Wakko's donation was to be accepted without any issues by the Salvation army, But the author tried to think how he would feel if he was at the helm of a charitable organization, and a 7 year old wanted to donate a fortune to him. He felt that if he had accepted it, it would not feel right and that he would've tried to convince the 7 year old to keep the money.

-The mysterious man who talks with Wakko while the world freezes, Is supposed to represent the Christian God.

-On that note, Steven Spielberg, the Executive Producer of Animaniacs, Is Jewish. It's also rumored that the voice actors for the warner siblings are christians, Thus explaining why they had no problem doing the "Little Drummer Warners" Short on animaniacs. On another note, Rob Paulsen also had a role on the Christian video series "Greatest adventures; Stories from the bible." From 1985 to 1993.

-When Yakko says "Seeing straight to Florida." which in political correctness, means "Seeing a nude woman."

-In the same commercial, If you did read the phone number upside down (5318008) it reads "Boobies."

-Pinky and the brain's commercial is a parody of the SPCA's canadian commercials for adopting animals, in which they like to film animals in cages and have Sarah McLachlan music in the background.

-Archie comics fanfics are banned from fanfiction. This was the inspiration for Miss flamiel's PSA.

()()()()

Finally, a message from the author himself.

First of all, thank you for taking the time to read this fanfic (Frumouttamind and Goldengod 180, I'm talking to you) It's what happens when your imagination meets your fingertips and the 2 of them dance together creating art. I guess that's what fanfiction is.

Finally, I've always liked christmas specials, but could never write one because I could never do it justice. Finally, after many years, I discovered animaniacs (long after it went off the air) and then I had to write a christmas fic.

(As of this speech, we're only 3 minutes til 12 am, christmas morning)

Christmas not only is a time about family, or giving, it's about the birth of baby Jesus, who was the original gift. the gift from god, reminding us that deep down, he really does love us, and wants us to go to heaven, hence why jesus came to die for our sins. Yeah, I know that's cliché, but it's true. It's the best gift any of us could get.

And if the warner siblings were real, god would love them too. Personally, I think god loves the zany, hyper-active people the most. It's people like that who are always thinking and always give a gift daily to others - the gift of laughter.

I'm about to post the last chapter. All the best in 2014 and the years to come. None of that atheist happy holidays crap, I say "Merry Christmas."

-Phil from Produce


End file.
